Tagged: Michael Davis

I have no real theme this week but I’d like to share some random thoughts. These are some of the things that make me ask…is you stupid? Not to be confused with “Are you stupid?” Is you stupid is a much better way to express my frustration. Just saying is you stupid sounds right in some situations. It lets the person you are talking to know they are stupid but… with a smile.

Not to long ago a good friend of mine called me and asked me to take a look at a project. It was not his project, he was shopping it around for a hotshot TV producer. I was told that this project would make a great comic book series and I was asked if I would get involved and present it to some publishers.

I have been lucky enough to close some major deals with major publishers and know some power brokers. This is outside of comic book publishers, which are no longer the only game in town for comics. As I write this I’m on a plane to New York City for a meeting with Harper Collins Publishers. I’ve been selling comic book universes to major publishers since 1996. The Action Files, a series I created, has been a Simon & Schuster universe since 1997. I’m proud to say that I saw the trend with comics and major publishers before it was a trend.

Anywho, my friend of almost twenty years tells me that he has a series that will be bigger than The Matrix. It was created by a big time producer and they want me involved. Truth be told I don’t really do a lot of pitching of other people’s projects anymore. It’s simply too much trouble. If I don’t create it, then I have little incentive to try and get it sold. As I said – too much trouble. My only exception these days is introducing young talented creators to people who may be able to help them. Help with advise for the most part because that is sorely lacking in our field.

So I’m pitched this series that will be “bigger than The Matrix!” and…

I mean really sucked as in very bad. So I ask you what do you do? Do I say, “Wow. That sucked?” Nah that would be insensitive and you know me. I’m Mr. Sensitivity. Or perhaps I say “My god, this is worst than that sitcom about slavery (a real show) that was on TV for half an episode before the network put down the crack pipe and realized what they put on the air.”

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Above Gotham City, Bat-Man looked down at the two hoods. From his vantage point they could not see him, nor could they hear him as the sounds of their hurried footsteps and thoughts of their impending criminal act drowned out all sounds real or imagined. Bat-Man swung above them watching, waiting for what he knew was coming. True to his instincts, the two men settle on a victim. The middle-aged man had no idea that he was about to be robbed. Then again, the two thugs had no idea they were going to be beaten… badly.

“Hey, buddy.” One of the criminals said. The middle-aged man turned around. His eyes went immediately to the gun the man was holding. The two gangsters smiled, they loved the fear in the marks eyes. “You know what this is. Give us your money.” The victim’s name was Larry Wright. His friends call him “Mr. Right” with an “R.” That’s because he is so right wing and so conservative. Mr. Right has a lot of friends, but too bad for him none of his friends were there to help him. As if they would. No, he was alone… or so he thought.

“Did you not hear me?” The man with the gun shouted. “Give us your money!” Mr. Right could not move. He could not understand why he could not move or speak. He was frozen. Why could he not simply hand the man his wallet? Was he scared? How could that be? He was Mr. Right he was the man who speaks out he was not scared of anything.

The man with the gun yelled as he walked towards Mr. Right with the gun leveled between the frozen man’s eyes. “Hey. Faggot! I’m taking to you.”

Somehow, Mr. Right found his voice. “I’m not a faggot.”

Without a sound, Bat-Man dropped onto the two thugs. With one swift move he disarmed the gunman with his Batarang while kicking the other man with a roundhouse that almost took his head off. The disarmed gunman launched himself at Bat-Man. Bat-Man smiled as he drove his right fist into the gunman’s face and, immediately, his left fist into his stomach. The force of one blow bent the man over the other stood him upright again.

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Whenever I meet a celebrity, I say one of two things: either Can I have some money? or Black people love you. Which one depends on the star. When I met Al Sharpton it would not have been cool to say black people love you… because they don’t.

I’m kidding. It’s just much more fun to say black people love you to someone who’s not black. The looks on their faces are mostly priceless… mostly. I work in television and have the opportunity to meet a bunch of Hollywood types – actors, directors and producers. When I meet someone on business I’m not quite the knucklehead I am when I meet someone at a party or some other random place.

I’m always interested in what people who don’t work in the industry think of celebrities. If you read my column regularly you know I’m hard on some Hollywood stars and their behavior.  So I thought I would take the time to give you a few of my many positive encounters.

The first time I ever took a drink I was in the ninth grade and I was trying to be cool. My friend Earl and I were going to a party and we each had a bottle of really cheap wine. Earl had a bottle of Wild Irish Rose and I had a bottle of MD2020. That’s short for Mad Dog. How did two 13 years old kids get their hands on those bottles of wine? We went in and gave the clerk money, that’s how.

What about ID’s?

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