Tagged: superhero

Gossip Gal Reports To The World!

  • News
  • April 1, 2013

2498952242_d16205d098Hey ComicMix readers. Gossip Gal here and today’s my biggest news day ever! Thanks to my many sources, I’ve just heard the most delicious tidbits – and what kind of Gossip Gal would I be if I didn’t share them with my loyal devotees? So widen those eyes, prepare to be surprised, and read on.

Marvel Comics Launches The Young 21!

Earlier this morning, a spokesman for Marvel Comics excitedly announced a bold new “initiative” being launched by the company next Wednesday. The “Young 21,” as the revamp of current Marvel comics is being dubbed, will wipe the slate of continuity-laden past comics stories clean and allow for writers and artists to created a fresh and more easily understood “superhero universe” that new readers can enjoy.

“All the guys were sitting around in the office one day,” Marvel spokesman Mr. C. Howe revealed, “and no one could think of any new stories for our beloved flagship characters. I mean, they’ve already Done All The Things, pretty much. So we were stumped. Then one of our marketing consultants had the idea to “throw out” everything that has happened to The Avengers, The X-Men, the Fantastic Four, and all of our other famous characters since the launch of Marvel Comics, and begin their stories again, looking at where each of them was at twenty-one, when many were just starting out on their paths to greatness. It was genius!”

Mr. Howe continued, outlining the way The Young 21 will be structured. “Well, we don’t want to alienate any of our past and present fans,” he said, “so these will still be the characters you know and love. But their stories will be streamlined to get rid of any character development past writers may have attempted that proved generally unpopular, and there will be changes to make them more relatable to today’s readers. For instance, the X-Men will get an all-new costume! And one of the Avengers may now be gay – you never know! A few beloved characters may lose important relationships with parents or long-established significant others to story changes, but the hot new storylines will be more than enough to make up for any sense of betrayal and loss

“The new series will also look at some of our female characters in a different and more exciting light,” Mr. Howe reported. “For instance, what was Sue Storm like at twenty-one? Well, she was a bit more stimulating than her usual motherly place in the Fantastic Four would have us believe. Readers who have come to love her for her caring role in the lives of the FF won’t believe the wild times she had with Victor von Doom and Namor back in the day in this re-launch series.” The whole first issue of the new FF takes place pool-side, and you’d better believe you haven’t seen Sue like this before. We’re also taking a new look at Kitty Pryde, who was, frankly, a bit boring in our past stories. But her updated look and attitude is going to WOW new readers. Our best creators, Dan, Dave, Jason, Scott, Bill, and Joe have all assured us that female readers in particular are really going to identify with this fresh take.”

My sources report that the first issues of The Young 21 will hit comic book stores April 10, ComicMix fans – so be sure to report in at GossipGal.com and let me know what you think. And now for another bit of exciting news…

Robert Downey Jr. is Iron Man!

At a press conference outside of his recently-acquired Malibu home, Robert Downey Jr. announced today that he actually is, in real life, the superhero called “Iron Man.” “Yes, it’s true,” he stated, while twirling a pair of purple shades idly between his fingers. “The movies are based on a true story: I am Iron Man. I can’t deny it any more, not after so many people have pointed it out. I mean, they’re always saying how I am Iron Man. How could anyone not believe it, with all that? I really don’t know why I thought I could hide it in the first place. But I’m done hiding now. I’ll say it loud and I’ll say it proud: this country owes its safety to me.”

When questioned as to why, if this was true, no one had ever seen an actual Iron Man flying or walking around except in the movies and at fan conventions, Downey replied, “Well, we had to change things for the movies to make it believable to the unenlightened masses. But in real life, I didn’t go through nearly as many design changes. The suit sprang as if fully formed from the genius that is my intellect, and because I am a futurist (like my fictional counterpart), I looked ahead far enough during my earliest designs to go straight for a stealth suit. So when I’m using the suit, I’m practically invisible if I want to be. Also, I can be wearing the suit, and people will only see me. Like, I’m wearing it right now, but you can’t see it. That’s how stealth my suit is. But really; no one watching a movie would have believed that.”

When further questioned as to why no one had ever heard of a single superheroic deed performed by a real-life Iron Man, Downey replied: “Well obviously it’s a government conspiracy. Like the moon landing.”

Well well, ComicMix readers, there’s a bit of news that can hardly be believed; but truth or fiction, we here at Gossip Gal Central wouldn’t object to Mr. Downey using a stealth suit to pay us a visit, if you know what we mean. And now, for a little bit of local oddity to round out your day:

Rare Book Collector Scammed Into Buying ‘Encyclopedia Deadpoolica’!

Ms. Fannie Mae Richards, well-known rare book dealer of West Hollywood, was distressed after her quest to obtain one of the only full sets of actual paper encyclopedias still in existence was thwarted by an unknown vandal who had apparently defaced every page of every book in the set before selling the set via Craigslist.

“Every single cover looks like this,” she said, dismayed, while gesturing to a book cover in which “Britann” had been crossed out and replaced with “Deadpool.” “What does that even mean?”

Ms. Richards was also puzzled by the contents of the books. “All of the pages contain messy, incomprehensible ‘edits,’ she said. The W volume is particularly strange.” She showed this correspondent the entry for “weasel,” over which someone had written, “Skinny nerdy dude with glasses who builds neat gadgets. They go whoosh bang boom,” and drawn a rough sketch of a bespectacled face with short, somewhat spiky hair. Flipping to another page, she displayed the entry for ‘wolverine,’ over which someone had written, in varying sizes and colors, BUB BUB BUB BUB BUB until the entire page was covered. In the bottom right corner, in tiny letters, was written, “SNIKT BOOM BUB!”

“I don’t understand any of this,” Ms. Richards complained, clearly distraught by the damage that had been done to the hallowed texts, “but I really want my five dollars back.”

Sounds like a Craigslist mischief-maker is in our midst, ComicMix fans, so buy cautiously and don’t get scammed!

That’s all the news that’s fit to share today. But knowing this town, I’ll have more for you very, very soon.

So until next time: you know you love me.

XOXO, Gossip Gal.

 

Martha Thomases: Not For Kids Anymore

Thomases Art 130329As Blondie says, “Dreaming is free.”

Which is lucky for me, because I have a rather frantic week, and not a lot of original ideas for a column. Sure, I could write about the John Stewart scandal (or non-scandal, depending on which rumor you believe,), but I am late to that party. I could write about some obscure book that deserves more attention, but I am behind in my reading.

My sub-conscious came through for me.

Last night, I had one of my recurring dreams in which I still work for DC. Sometimes in these dreams I no longer work for DC, but sneak into an office and pretend I do. And sometimes, I even wear clothes. I can’t remember which of these scenarios was at play this time, but I remember getting a memo from Jenette Kahn about some new publishing initiative.

In my dream, I ran to my son, the genius writer, about the opportunity this afforded us. We had two ideas worth pursuing.

The first, and more interesting, was a graphic novel about an upper-middle-class teenage white girl in Georgia in the 1980s who is, unbeknownst to her or anyone else, the reincarnation of Mohammed Ali. I don’t think we should let the fact that Ali is still alive get in the way of the fact that this would be awesome.

However, since my subconscious apparently has no literary taste, in my dream I urged we concentrate our attention on an on-going series, The Legion of Jimmy Olsen. It would be like the Legion of Super-Heroes, but set in the present, not the future, and feature all the different characters Jimmy has morphed into over the years. You would have your Turtle Boy, your giant, your caveman Beatle, even your girl.

All at the same time.

I would buy that series in a heartbeat. Wouldn’t you?

The New 52 doesn’t have a lot of Jimmy in it. There isn’t even much Lois Lane. They show up to take pictures or report on some Superman exploit or another, but that’s about it. Grant Morrison had Jimmy doing a bit more, as a friend to Clark.

Even Grant couldn’t work in any Turtle Boy.

As the comics audience has aged, publishers have tried to respond with more mature offerings. They don’t think their readers need a character like Jimmy with whom to identify. Today’s superhero reader, they think, needs stories where the universe is at stake every single issue.

This is a shame, because we could use somewhat less constant cosmic apocalypse, and a bit more whimsy.

And gorillas.

SATURDAY: Marc Alan Fishman

SUNDAY: John Ostrander

 

Mike Gold: The Superhero Ideal

Gold Art 130327Why doesn’t Batman use a gun?

Because his parents were shot down? Really? I mean… really?

That’s weak. Even for an obsessive-compulsive who’s borderline psychotic, that’s just silly. He’s got a belt full of lethal weapons, he’s got more in his car, and even more in his cave. And, speaking of OCD, they all have the same first name.

So, why doesn’t Batman use a gun?

Because it’s boring. It’s visually boring, and comics is a visual storytelling medium.

If the Joker comes running at him, he can whip out his Batgun and splatter the walls with green hair. Or he can start off a nifty three-page fight sequence.

Well, he can also whip out his Batarang and separate the crown from the clown, but that’s just one long panel. It might be entertaining if we were in one of those once-every-generation 3-D fads, but those fads never last long.

Let’s try it again.

The Red Skull is out after Captain America. Cap whips around and:

A)  Shoots him, obviously in self-defense and likely saving the lives of dozens if not hundreds of innocents to come, or

B)   Frisbees his mighty shield across the page and leaps upon the evil bastard and pummels the poo out of the guy, who even in defeat, manages to escape.

Yeah. What would Jack Kirby do?

Superheroes are not anti-gun because they are possessed by the liberal media. Superheroes don’t use guns because it’s unexciting storytelling. Gunplay in superhero comics is visually boring.

Police use guns because they are not paid by the panel and they have some concern over what their spouses are making for dinner. Taking the longer view, our military uses guns for much the same reason. In their world, visual excitement will likely get them killed.

You know who else uses guns?

Gun nuts. But that’s only in the real world.

THURSDAY: Dennis O’Neil

FRIDAY: Martha Thomases

 

Dennis O’Neil: Touch

O'Neil Art 130321Young and mostly silent Jake, the enigmatic hero of the television program Touch, doesn’t look ancient. Nor does he look particularly Greek. But ah – might he be a reincarnation of Pythagoras? Or at least a fictional character inspired by Pythagoras?

Who?

Okay, for you hordes of non-philosophy majors pit there: Pythagoras was probably the first guy who called himself a “philosopher.” He lived about 2500 years ago and he taught that all things were connected, that what he called the One was at the base of everything and that this One expressed itself in numbers. Or such is my admittedly sketchy understanding of Py’s riff.

And Jake? Well, Jake is this kid, about ten, who doesn’t speak but writes or otherwise communicates numbers to his father and eventually, after exciting adventures, Jake’s numbers tie diverse things/people/events together and provide the solution to that episode’s problem.

How does Jake manage his feats? Well…in short, he seems to be a superhero. No costume, no flamboyant displays of abnormal prowess. But we know that Jake has some kind of metahuman ability – he’s a mutant, maybe? – and that there are others like him, and finally that some person or organization has dispatched a geeky assassin to exterminate them.

Though there are echoes of earlier superhero sagas here – Watchmen and the X-Men titles come immediately to mind – Touch is a novel iteration of the superhero concept, and as original as anything in our story-saturated culture is likely to be. That it’s also well-written and acted is a nice bonus.

But what really pleases me about it is what I understand to be its central metaphor. Unlike most of our televised mind-gum, Touch is not extolling the essentiality of family, though Jake’s relationship to his father is important, nor does it glorify the Individual, nor assure us that right makes might, which is why the good guys inevitably out-bash the bad guys. Instead, it displays a notion common to ol’ Py and modern quantum physicists – the Higgs boson crowd – and Buddhists and feel free to add some examples of your own. That notion: everything is connected.

Which is obvious when you think about it, despite the political howls when our current president observed that, sorry, nobody accomplishes anything without some kind of help. You wouldn’t be reading this without the biosphere and the biosphere depends of interaction of gravity with mass and particle and millions of years ago a lobe fish crawled onto land and began the evolutionary journey toward becoming Justin Bieber and and and…and some thirteen-point-seven billion years ago the Big Bang happened and here we are, watching teevee, and passing the popcorn.

I doubt that Touch’s creators are in the business of teaching us cosmology. Their job is to entertain, and in my living room, they do. But they do so without lading on dramatic tropes whose overuse has given them cliché status, and since you and I are united, maybe you’ll join me in being grateful to them.

FRIDAY: Martha Thomases

SATURDAY: Marc Alan Fishman

 

Martha Thomases: The Needles And The Damage Done

http://www.comicmix.com//wp-content/uploads/2013/03/newport_knitting_jun_051.jpg

Twice a week, I teach knitting to people with cancer and caregivers.  Most of you probably think of knitting as something serene, a hobby for little old ladies (current and future).  However, when I teach, my instructions are filled with images of guns and shooting, stabbing people with knitting needles, and  when I make a mistake, I threaten my materials with unspeakably filthy and unnatural acts.

I do this when I teach for a couple of reasons.  Most important, it makes the techniques easier to remember.  However, for this group in particular, it gives a sense of control.  These people have so little control in their lives that it’s great to have control over knitting needles and yarn.

It’s powerful.  When you’re staring the possibility of dying in the face, it’s good to have something that makes you feel powerful.

This is a long, roundabout way of getting to the intersection of a couple of trends I see in our beloved graphic story medium.  As I wrote last week, the industry has a sad tendency to throw away creative talent when it is deemed to be “old.”  There is also a pathetic paucity of work by women, racial minorities, and people whose identify as queer.

Things are slightly better outside of the Big Two (Marvel and DC). but not much.  Not really.

This is a problem.  It’s a problem in many media (especially broadcast news, but that’s another rant) but it seems to me that comics is one of the worst.  It seems like a paradox, but by appealing to a cultural ideal of straight, white young men, comics may be stuck in a closet of marginalization.

We all have impulses and emotions.  Many of these are not welcome by the larger society in which we not only live, but rely on for daily support.  I think it’s healthy and mature to work out inappropriate feelings with the vicarious experience of entertainment.

Specifically, when we feel angry at our lives and helpless within are mortal bodies, we need power fantasies.  Hence, in other mass media, we get not just superhero stories. but police procedurals, sword and sorcery, House and Buffy the Vampire Slayer.

There’s other emotions that are inappropriate to express in our daily, public lives.  We don’t show grief or sadness or lust.  Men don’t show nurturing.  These feelings are for private time, or for working out with art.

There are books and movies for these feelings.  Dreary foreign films about death, silly romantic comedies with Katherine Heigl or Kate Hudson.  This movie, which is one of the most bleak, self-loathing things I’ve ever seen.  Sometimes, I need Carey Mulligan to hate herself so I don’t have to hate myself.

There are some brilliant graphic novels that appeal to these audiences, but they are few and far between.

There is nothing wrong with having a target audience.  That’s effective marketing (note:  marketing is not the same as editing, or publishing).  However, if one plans to have an entertainment conglomerate and see some growth, one needs to occasionally try for other audience segments, or at least other audience moods.

In the meantime, if you see any bald-headed women making socks, watch your ass.

Michael Davis: Captain Action!

captain-action-550x852-9642213

My favorite toy ever is Captain Action.

I mean EVER.

When I was around four, my mother took my sister and me to a toy store. She told us we could have any one thing we wanted. My sister made a quick decision and choose a Barbie. I spent some time trying to choose between a guitar and a GI Joe. I finally made the decision and went with the Joe.

I was as happy as I had ever been with a toy.

GI Joe soon became my favorite toy, best friend and constant companion. Not too long after I got a Black GI Joe which was just a white GI Joe painted brown.

I could not have been happier.

After a time I had seven or eight Joes, as I made sure all my relatives knew my fascination with the action figure. Christmas and birthdays always brought me a new Joe.

My Joes were the highlights of my young life.

One fateful Saturday morning I was watching cartoons and on came a commercial for Captain Action.

Whoa.

Captain Action was cool all by itself but what was this I was seeing?  Did I dare believe my eyes? Did the good Captain ALSO change into OTHER SUPERHEROES???

OH YES HE DID!!

I had to have him. I had to have him, I HAD TO HAVE HIM!!!!

I waited impatiently for my mother to get out of bed. Saturday mornings were the only day she was able to sleep in. My mother worked two jobs six days a week, on Saturday she only worked one.

So I waited and waited for what seemed an eternity for her to get out of bed. When she did, I had to wait a wee bit longer (which seemed like decades) because she had to have her coffee. Facing my mother even today without her having had her coffee is a dangerous thing to do.

The second she went into the kitchen I joined her at the table with what had to be the biggest smile I’d ever had. I waited for her to brew her coffee (old school brewing, people, none of this bullshit Mr. Coffee) have that first sip but before I could start in on what I thought was going to be my best ‘I’ve GOT to have it’ plea my mother said;

“What do you want?”

“Captain Action!”

“What’s Captain Action?”

“It’s this cool superhero that changes into other superheroes!’

As if on cue, I heard the commercial playing on the living room television, and I left the table screaming like a mad child.

“Come see!! Come see!!”

My mother stood behind me while I stared again at the object of desire, convinced I would never ever want anything as bad.

“See? That’s Captain Action? Can I have it? PLEASE?”

“Oh, it’s like a GI Joe,” my mother said.

“FUCK GI JOE!!!”

No, I didn’t say that but thinking back that’s how I felt.

After the commercial I resorted to speaking so fast and with so much passion prying that my mother would see how my life would be over if I did not have that toy. I figured as long as I didn’t hear “no” there was still a chance. As every kid knows if you keep talking and don’t give your parents an opportunity to chime in they can’t say “no.”

“Michael, stop!”

Shit.

“Get your coat, you can come shopping with me and we will see about your toy.”

THANKYOUGOD!!!

Off to Gertz we went! Gertz was THE department store back in the day. When we got there my mother walked right to the toy department and brought me Captain Action and the Batman and Superman costume changes.

At that point I had to wonder, who was this woman and what had she done with my mother.

This was entirely way to good to be true.

As I would find out soon… it certainly was.

End of Part One.

 

Dennis O’Neil: Fredric Wertham, Superhero?

O''Neil Art 130328Did Fredric Wertham imitate superheroes? And if so, did he realize that he was doing it?

But let’s back up and give you latecomers an establishing shot or two. Way back in the early 50s, Dr. Wertham, a New York City psychiatrist, wrote a book provocatively titled Seduction of the Innocent which claimed to use science to demonstrate that comic books were corrupting the nation’s youth. Comics were already being attacked by editorial writers and at about the same time as the book’s publication, a senator named Estes Kefauver was convening hearings to investigate the same charge. The result of all this accusing was twofold: comics publishers went out of business leaving over 800 people suddenly unemployed, and the ragtag remnants of the business created The Comics Code Authority to censor their publications and thus placate the witch hunters. The comic book enterprise went into sharp decline, both financially and artistically until the late 50s, when Julius Schwartz and Stan Lee reinvented the superhero genre.

A sorry story. But ancient history. Well, not quite. Dr. Wertham was back in the news last week. According to the New York Times, Carol L. Tilley of the University of Illinois, examined Wertham’s papers and found numerous examples of research that were “manipulated, overstated, compromised and fabricated.”

Wow. And ouch. Not only did the doctor help put hundreds of decent folk out of work and, arguably, cripple an American art form, but he cooked the books to do it. There have been, for decades, doubts about Wertham’s methods, perhaps the most prevalent of which was that he ignored the validity of control groups. (Okay, goes the narrative, the doc found a hundred young lawbreakers who read comics, but he disregarded the thousands of Eagle Scouts who were also comics readers.) But until now, nobody has accused him of outright lying

Apparently he did lie.

I wonder why. Did he find these entertainments so unutterably vulgar that he was able to convince himself that they were also malign? Was he a zealot who honestly believed that these comic books were pernicious! and corrupt! and evil! and were obliterating the decency of American youth? And did he feel that he was justified in using any means available to quell this menace? That seems to be how zealots like to think.

Or was he a superhero? Consider: the bad guys in superhero stories may blather about ruling the world or getting rich or attaining revenge or, like zealots, proving that they’re right, but the real reason they exist is to give the hero a chance to show his stuff. We like heroes, and we like them to do magnificent deeds, and villains provide the circumstances for superheroic action.  So, Dr. Wertham: did he see, in the anti-comic book excitement, a chance to get famous and cement his reputation and maybe grab a royalty check? Were comics his supervillains, giving him his big opportunity? He was already respected and, on the whole, he seemed to be a pretty decent guy, but maybe he had his share of hidden demons.

I don’t know. I’ll probably never know, and neither will you. But we might find a lesson in the Wertham saga: don’t trust authority figures. I hope that isn’t news to you.

FRIDAY: Martha Thomases

SATURDAY: Marc Alan Fishman

 

Mindy Newell: Lost In The Darkness

Newell Art 130218“I grew up reading superheroes where the most important element of that name was ‘hero’ rather than ‘super.’ But, lately, a number of the books from the big two superhero publishers, DC and Marvel, seem to have forgotten the hero part of the name.”

My friend and fellow writer Corinna Lawson, the woman some of you may know as the Geek Mom who writes for Wired, wrote those words in her latest piece, entitled “The Cliffs of Insanity: Putting the Hero Back in Superhero.”

It struck a deep chord in me.

“The Death of Captain America” (Captain America #25, March 2007) scared me and deeply bothered me. It seemed to signal the defeat of American idealism, the loss of belief in this country’s basic precepts of life, liberty, the pursuit of happiness, and freedom for all. And worst of all, it seemed to me that Marvel was telling its readers, most importantly the kids of America, that there was no future here, that the dream was over.

It was an allegory; Marvel seemed to be telling us, for the death of America.

Oh, I think I understand why this story was written. Darkness had overtaken this country, starting with the Supreme Court deciding the election of the Bush administration, ignoring the people’s right to vote or to have their votes recounted or retaken. And the Bush administration, led by Darth Chaney, was such a causally evil administration, ruining the careers and reputations of anyone who got in their way, including people like General Colin Powell and outed CIA agent Valerie Plame, and casually lying to the American public and suckering them into an unneeded and unnecessary war in Iraq, while letting the perpetrator of 9/11, Osama Bin Laden, escape from Tora Bora because the administration could use him and Al Quada to continue to scare the public into accepting the erosion of the Constitution and the Bill of Rights.

Yeah, I got it. It did seem that America, the America I grew up in, that, even with all its continuing problems, the America that promised hope to the world, was dead and buried.

There is a reason why totalitarian and oppressive governments attack the arts and kill writers and artists and sculptors and ban plays and books and movies. Because the arts are where ideas flourish, where the flicker of hope, of what should be, stays alive. Most of us do not think of comics as part of the arts, but they are, combining both the written word and illustration in one format, and as art I believe that comics both affect and reflect society, and are capable of promoting ideas and initiating discussions.

Return Of The Jedi (which would have been a better movie if Luke had been corrupted by Daddy Vader, and Leia and Han had to save him, and then Luke could have saved his father). Ben-Hur. The Searchers. The Bridge On The River Kwai. Watchmen. Buffy The Vampire Slayer. Angel. Battlestar Galactica. Ultimately, all these stories are about the rich and complex nature of good and evil, of love and hate, of triumph and tragedy. Great stories are about anger and hate, lost and found souls, corruption and redemption.

Joseph Campbell’s The Hero With A Thousand Faces, which George Lucas used in telling the story of Luke Skywalker in the original Star Wars movies, is about the monomyth of the world’s cultures throughout history, which is the journey of the hero:

The hero starts in the ordinary world, and receives a call to enter an unusual world of strange powers and events – the “call to adventure.” If the hero accepts the call to enter this strange world, the hero must face tasks and trials – a “road of trials,” either facing these trials alone or with assistance. At its most intense, the hero must survive a severe challenge, often with help earned along the journey. If the hero survives, the hero may achieve a great gift – the “goal or boon” – that results in the discovery of important self-knowledge. The hero must then decide whether to return with this boon – the “return to the ordinary world” – and often faces more challenges on the return journey. If the hero is successful in returning, the boon or gift may be used to improve the world – the application of the boon.”

Once upon a time, our comic book heroes took this journey.

Now?

As Corinna wrote, “But, lately, a number of the books from the big two superhero publishers, DC and Marvel, seem to have forgotten the hero part of the name.”

I agree, Corinna.

Too many of our comic heroes have lost their way.

TUESDAY MORNING: Emily S. Whitten

TUESDAY AFTERNOON: Michael Davis

 

Michael Davis: Dark Horse Wants Me Dead

Davis Art 130129Mike Richardson CEO, publisher and owner has ordered a hit on me. Here’s the story…

Over a decade ago I sold a project to DC Comics and that deal fell apart.

Why? Why does the phone always ring when you are in the bathroom? Why do gay people join the GOP? Why from behind certain white guys look like girls? Why after I found out he was a guy did I still buy him a drink?

Sometimes it’s just silly to ask why. Sometimes you just continue on your journey the why becoming less and less important. I’m also not one to relive old dumb shit in my life.

This is not the place to pick at old wounds…but since I know you want to know…

The editor assigned to the project wanted me off the project. Yeah, my project, my idea and he wanted me gone. Why?

Why ask why? Why does every fat girl you made fun of in high school turn out to be a skinny fox who won’t give your stupid ass the time of day? Why don’t Democrats make it a point to never let the country forget we went to war twice for no fucking reason because of the GOP? Why do some people like fruitcake?

I’m above asking why and won’t lower myself to even think about why the editor wanted me off my own project. But what kind of writer would I be to leave my fans (both of them) wondering?

The stupid motherfucker just didn’t like me.

DC would have wrote me a check and still did the project without me but I politely told the editor “No thank you, I’ll take the project elsewhere.”

I think my exact words were something like “Fuck you bitch.”

Two days after that polite conversation, I was pitching the project to Dark Horse. Mike Richardson loved it and signed on to do it.

Take that, DC Comics!

Dark Horse is one of, if not the, best place, to do a creator owned property was going to do my project! On top of that Mike Richardson was going to edit the book himself!

Mike Richardson a legend in the business! Mike Richardson, maker of great comics, great movies, great toys!

Mike Richardson was going to oversee my project! That was indeed great news!

Mike Richardson was going to oversee my project! That was indeed a great problem!

Why you ask was that both great news a great problem?

Why ask wh…oh fuck it, I’ll just tell you.

It’s great because Mike is one of the best at what he does. Just look at the numerous products Dark Horse does all over the entertainment world Dark Horse is into movies, television, toys you name the media chances are good that Dark Horse has a project in it.

Not to shabby being in business with the guy that runs all that eh?

Why is this a problem?

Because Mike Richardson may be in Portland on a Monday, Los Angeles Monday night and Prague Tuesday afternoon. When Mike is overseeing your project meetings and feedback can take a day a week or a couple of months.

I started sending Mike outlines of the four-issue superhero mini series and Mike would send me notes or we would sit down and go over it. I did many and I mean many drafts of this superhero epic over a couple of years.

That’s right, years.

One day out of the blue Mike called me and said; “This isn’t a superhero story. Let’s take the superheroes out ”

Mind you, I had written literally hundreds of pages of outline over the course of what was now three years. Also this was to be my “Black Watchman,” a term coined by Keith Giffen, BTW.

So now I have to start all over. So I did and this was when I realized that my “Black Watchmen” story was a good story but it wasn’t this story, so Mike was right.

So for the next couple of years I’m submitting outlines to Mike he’s giving me notes and we meet on occasion to talk about the project.

Then low and behold, one day Mike says to me about my latest outline, ‘This is it, go do the book!”

So now I have to do the book.

Shit…

End Part One.

WEDNESDAY: Mike Gold And Alfred Pennyworth’s Guns

 

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