Happy International Talk Like A Pirate Day!
Founded by Cap’n Slappy and Ol’ Chumbucket in 1996, International Talk Like A Pirate Day is celebrated today, the 19th of September here and abroad. The two mates began talking like buccaneers one day, and thanks to some promotion from Dave Barry, we can now all share in this truly amazing holiday.
So, today, unlike any other day in the year, you’re allowed to yell “Avast, ye matey!” when you see your friend at Buffalo Wild Wings. You may refer to the waitress as “a soddy lass” or “a buxom wench”. When you order your wings, you can dust off some phrases like “Ahoy! I’ll ‘ave the cap’n’s order of yer finest wings, and a enough grog to make me loaded to the Gunwales!” And when the waitress gives you the stank eye for speaking pirate, bang your fist on the table and say “By the powers! You land-lubber lass…I said get me a plunder of wings and ale, lest I and me mates turn this table over and make you walk the plank!”
If you still need a little hint or two on how to talk like a pirate, you should double up on your adjectives. Instead of calling your last issue of Brightest Day a “waste of my time”, you can say its “a stinking, rotten waste of me time, arrrrgh!”. Another hint would be to use ‘I be’ instead ‘I am’, and drop your G’s and V’s. That way when you declare “I be throwin’ you this issue of X-Men, and I be wantin’ a refund!” the store clerk will give you a knowing glance.
Tip of our pirate hat to the the fine folks at yarr.org, for gettin’ us up to speed on this momentous day. Now if you’ll excuse us, we need to go put on our peg legs, and hoist our sails on for Ford Explorarrrrrgh!