The much-anticipated epic space adventure Valerian: City of Alpha is now live on iOS and Google Play. And thanks to our friends at STX Films, we have one of their limited edition mouse pads to give away.
It is the official mobile game of Luc Besson’s upcoming sci-fi movie Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets starring Dane DeHaan and Cara Delevingne. The legendary director is famous for creating sci-fi blockbusters including The Fifth Element and Lucy.
All you have to do is tell us what most excites you about the game and why. We want your responses no later than 11:59 p.m., Friday, July 28. This contest is open to readers only in North America. The decision of ComicMix‘s judges will be final.
The film has been described as visually spectacular and the mobile game creates an engaging experience that will draw players into the Valerian universe. Valerian: City of Alpha was built from the astonishingly intricate backstory created for the movie. Gamers get to explore that super cool universe for themselves.
“Spil Games has successfully captured our movie in a mobile game,” says Virginie Besson-Silla, the movie’s producer. “What we see is an immersive experience that Valerian fans will have fun with.”
The movie is set on the astonishing City of Alpha — an ever-expanding metropolis where species from all over the universe have converged over centuries to share knowledge, intelligence and culture with one another.
The mobile game begins 590 years earlier when Alpha is still just a space station. The aim is to explore and discover the aliens and planets that will come to be featured in the movie. Players must complete exciting missions, connect with alien species and come up with strategies to help them create the knowledge-sharing metropolis. The ultimate objective is building for themselves the biggest and best version of the City of Alpha.
Much more than just a game of a movie
Revel in stunning artwork
Explore the entire universe in which the movie is set
Connect with mind-blowing alien cultures and snag their technologies
Create the Alpha metropolis — your imagination is the only limit
A unique combination of city building, exploration and diplomacy
Notes:
Valerian: City of Alpha is free to play on iOS and Google Play. It has been produced and is published by Spil Games under license from EuropaCorp. Spil Games is a fast-growing and agile games publisher and producer, already reaching huge audiences across the web and mobile. In the last two years, it has ramped up its mobile business to 250m installs. This growth is mainly organic. Its target is 1 billion downloads.
Many recognize Spil Games as an up-and-comer in the mobile gaming industry. For example, Nolan Bushnell, the godfather of video games, is developing his first ever mobile game with Spil Games.
Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets will launch in the United States in 2D and 3D beginning 21 July 2017. Spil Games has been selected to create the exclusive mobile game for the movie.
About the Film:
Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets is the visually spectacular new adventure film from Luc Besson, the legendary director of The Professional, The Fifth Element and Lucy, based on the ground-breaking comic book series, created by Pierre Christin and Jean-Claude Mezieres, which inspired a generation of artists, writers and filmmakers. Valerian is one of the top five biggest selling Franco-Belgian comics titles of its publisher, Dargaud.
In the 28th century, Valerian (Dane DeHaan) and Laureline (Cara Delevingne) are a team of special operatives charged with maintaining order throughout the human territories. Under assignment from the Minister of Defense, the two embark on a mission to the astonishing city of Alpha—an ever-expanding metropolis where species from all over the universe have converged over centuries to share knowledge, intelligence and cultures with each other. There is a mystery at the center of Alpha, a dark force which threatens the peaceful existence of the City of a Thousand Planets, and Valerian and Laureline must race to identify the marauding menace and safeguard not just Alpha, but the future of the universe.
While fully aware of Japan’s Ghost in the Shell and its impact as a Manga and Anime, I never experienced any version of it. As a result, I watched the recent live-action film version without preconceived notions. I knew all about the casting controversy but until there’s an actress of Japanese descent who can open a movie wide, casting decisions, such as this, will continue. So get over it.
Masamune Shirow created an interesting meditation on where humanity is going as he, like Ray Kurzweil, foresees the day when man and machine blend into a singular being. It won’t be overnight, nor will it be neat and easy. As a result, the question of what does it mean to be human permeates the film as written by Jamie Moss, William Wheeler, and Ehren Kruger and directed by Rupert Sanders.
The story centers on Major (Scarlett Johansson), an accident victim who awakes to find her brain has been wired to an android body. She now serves Section 9, a counter-terrorism operation, currently tasked with hunting down the killer known only as Kuze (Michael Carmen Pitt). Along the way, she is seeing images making her question not only her humanity but her memories. While searching for the killer, she searches for her own identity.
This is a brilliantly designed and realized world so I wish we were more fully immersed in it rather than seeing it as colorful window dressing. The Section 9 agents operate in and around an urban society but we have no real feel for how this world works nor how the general populace feels about these cyborgs and androids living among them. What is real and what is acceptable? We’re given merely hints.
Instead, sadly, we have running, jumping, fighting, and way too much shooting. Additionally, Sanders has everyone underplay their parts, muting the emotions and robbing the characters of range. The movie is drab and dull, perfunctory, wasting the grand themes raised and world built in favor of the same old.
Johansson has certainly proved herself capable of both acting and action thanks to her Marvel work and Lucy so she shines here. While everyone else is robbed of color, she shimmers as she comes to realize she was the first successful ghost placed in a machine, but far from the first. Her confrontations with her designer, Dr. Ouelet should have crackled but are instead downplayed. Juliette Binoche, in a change of role, brings warmth and humanity to the character but doesn’t get to do enough with it.
Similarly, the Section 9 team is made up of an interesting variety of international actors but other than Pilou Asbæk as her partner Batou, none of them are seen enough for the audience to care.
By the time the Major gets answers, Kuze’s predictable rationale is revealed, and things are settled, we’re long passed caring, preferring a nap or the source material.
Ghost in the Shell comes in a variety of formats including the standard Combo Pack of Blu-ray, DVD, and Digital HD code. The film’s high definition transfer to Blu-ray is stunning, capturing the colors and shadows perfectly for home viewing. The Dolby Atmos soundtrack is a solid match for the visuals.
There are just three interesting Special Features: Hard-Wired Humanity: Making Ghost in the Shell, a multi-part Making Of feature that properly credits the set designers and WETA’s visual effects team for bringing the original to life. We look at the under-utilized Section 9: Cyber Defenders and then you finish with the Man & Machine: The Ghost Philosophy that talks a more interesting game than the film manages to deliver.
Recently I had the opportunity to visit the Nickelodeon Animation Studio and their new Entertainment Lab in Burbank, CA. I chatted with Chris Young, Senior Vice President for the Entertainment Lab; Chris Savino, creator of The Loud House; and Farnaz Esnaashari-Charmatz, creator of Shimmer and Shine. I played around in their newly developed immersive and interactive VR experience; sat in on a recording session for Shimmer and Shine; stopped in to say hi to Ciro Nieli, executive producer for Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, and see his cool office; and viewed all kinds of creativity in progress during the studio tour.
And let me tell you: the experience was awesome.
As in, so awesome, I’m wondering how Alternate Me could get a job there. Because let’s be honest – there are office jobs that look like The Office, and then there are workplaces like Nickelodeon, which has slime stairs, a SpongeBob wall, weird egg-cup like chairs that tip you in circles until you feel like maybe you’re going to fall backwards but you don’t, full-sized versions of cartoon characters just sitting around, rotating art exhibits, squishy seats shaped like the iconic Nickelodeon Splat, outdoor creative collaboration areas, and walls and walls of stills from their shows and white boards filled with creative notes and doodles.
And in the midst of all that is the Entertainment Lab, a new unit that will spearhead long-range research and development efforts around new technologies for Nick and its audience. There, I met with Chris Young, who invited me in to the immersive multiplayer virtual reality game they’re developing right now, the VR Slime Zone. Since it’s VR, the game requires a headset through which you view and hear the action. It also uses left and right handheld joysticks that you can walk around with. Once in the game, you can pick a Nickelodeon character to be, and then there are several activities to try.
When I played, first I got used to moving – both walking around on a real-world area of carpet to walk in the game, and teleporting my character to different spots using the controls. Then we were shown the slime gun, which can be used to – you guessed it – slime other players for points! Super-fun! In addition to that, you could use the slime gun to play a shooting gallery game. And if you wanted some variety, there was also a basketball court where you could shoot hoops (I was decent with the gun but throwing the weightless basketballs took some getting used to – I never did make a basket!); and for the more creative types, tubes of different-colored paints you could pick up and use to paint in the air.
What’s really cool about this game-in-progress – beyond the endless varieties of interactive activities the lab could potentially design for it – is that it’s a real-time VR interaction with other players. Some of the Nickelodeon folks hopped into the game with me to show me its features and interact; and Chris envisions that friends could play with each other in this space from their individual homes, in a more immersive experience than you can get from, say, playing a regular video game together.
After the demo, I sat down with Chris and he shared with me more of his thoughts about the new Lab and his goals for it:
“As Senior VP for the Entertainment Lab, my focus has been looking at new technology and how we can use it to create new forms of content or the tools that we use to create that content. One thing I do is look at using game engine technologies to create a real-time universe that uses virtual reality and mixed reality. …In the last half-year, we’ve been looking at the Lab with a more entertainment focus; to look at new ways of connecting some of this technology to live-action or to games and our recreation and consumer products business. There’s a cool opportunity right now around location-based technology – out-of-home experiences that might work in a retail or recreation-type setting.”
Chris also talked about the more future-focused aspect that exists for this Lab:
“The Lab really looks two to three years out, identifying new technology and cool ways we might use it to entertain our audience. It’s hard to predict what the future of entertainment is going to look like. The real opportunity right now is to experiment around with different ideas. For instance, the Slime Zone VR is a suggestion for what a Nick metaverse might be in the future, where you could connect with your friends and your family, and have these shared experiences around Nick IP. In the VR, you can interact, you can make art, you can watch cartoons, and you can run around with a slime blaster and slime each other…”
But Chris noted that the Lab is not just about bringing this interactive entertainment to the masses:
“A big focus of what we are trying to do here as well is to give these tools to the artists who work at Nickelodeon and help them see the potential for different ways for seeing things, or maybe unlock an idea.”
I bet a lot of cool ideas will come out of the Lab! You can listen to my whole interview with Chris Young here.
And speaking of cool ideas, I then sat down with Chris Savino and we talked about his show, The Loud House. The Loud House follows 11-year-old Lincoln Loud as he gives an inside look at what it takes to survive in the bedlam of a big family, especially as the only boy with 10 sisters. The show came about as after it was pitched as a two-minute short during Nickelodeon’s annual Animated Shorts Program. It was really great hearing Chris’s insights into working in animation for the last twenty-six years and on his show, which happily, I can share here!
We first discussed how things have changed with the internet, and how new talents can be discovered via that sharing.
“I am impressed with how much bravery kids have in putting their work out there and showing it, regardless of all the competition. But as much as things change they stay the same. I think it all boils down to talent – if you’re on the artist side, you kind of have to have it. And there has to be an awareness when you’re looking at other people’s work regarding whether they have a talent. Talent aside, there’s a need for understanding what the job entails; and the bigger picture of what your part of the job is giving to the whole. Sometimes it’s hard to get a perspective on that. But circling back around, the things that stay the same are that it’s all about storytelling and character – that is key. It’s also about using your role to make the story better than it was before you got it.”
Regarding how Chris came up with The Loud House, he shared:
“I’m a guy who admittedly has very few ideas; and when I have an idea that I like, it is with me for a long time. It could be years before I even show anybody anything about an idea… Over the years I have pitched a number of shows, but with this particular show, I was guaranteed a short after pitching three ideas to Nickelodeon’s Animated Shorts Program. The Loud House was originally a pitch about a boy rabbit with twenty-five sisters. I think Nickelodeon gravitated toward that pitch because it was about a big family, and they were looking for a big family. And the notion of me being from a big family – five boys and five girls – intrigued them. I think they thought it could bring authenticity to the project.
When it was suggested that the characters become human, I did start connecting the dots and pulling from my life. As they became human characters I started to connect with them more, and I realized that was what the show needed to get the audience to connect.”
Chris and I also talked in great detail about the development and growth of the show:
“For the first thirteen half-hours, I wanted to try to stay in the house as much as possible, because it was created like a microcosm of the world around them. That hallway was designed to feel like a street that they all lived on, but then you could go into their different domains and experience whatever their character is experiencing. But we knew eventually we needed to venture out. So we slowly expanded outwards from there.
While keeping Lincoln in the forefront, we were able to tell stories where even when he was the main character, the character who had the emotional arc was one of the sisters. And of course they had friends, and we started to show them more. Another thing that changed was showing the parents’ faces, which we didn’t show in the beginning. If the parents’ faces were shown, the idea was they’d have more of a role in the episode, and the kids could run to them and say, ‘I’m telling,’ and the episode would be over. I wanted to make sure that the kids, in all of their wisdom, were forced to solve their problems on their own. That was a rule up front.
One thing that happened that we didn’t expect is that we hired two super-talented voice actors for the parents, Brian Stepanek and Jill Talley, and the writers would come to the recordings and say ‘I want to write more for these people.’ So they started writing more dialogue, and the parents gained a bigger role, and it became something where we had to show their faces.”
We also chatted about what to expect from the next season, and branching out into other families:
“In the show, we ended up developing that Ronnie Anne, who likes Lincoln at school, turns out to be Bobby’s little sister, and he is dating Lincoln’s sister Lori. And then we kind of didn’t know what else we wanted to do with those characters, and I had this crazy idea to have them move away into the city with their grandparents, aunt, and uncle, and their kids, so it’s a multigenerational family. I think doing things like that also gives us new perspectives that we can look at, with generations, and culture, and heritage.”
Chris shared a lot of other fun tidbits, and you can listen to all of them here.
What was really fun about the studio visit was getting to talk to several show-runners in one day and hear their unique experiences. I next sat down with Farnaz Esnaashari-Charmatz to talk about her show, Shimmer and Shine. Farnaz shared that she started working at Nickelodeon fifteen years ago as an intern and came back after finishing her degree to work on a multitude of shows. During that, she started pitching to Nick Jr., and after multiple pitches and tries, she landed Shimmer and Shine in 2013. Speaking of the show and her inspirations, she said:
“My little girl and boy inspire me in so many ways every single day. For example, Shimmer’s catch phrase is ‘My favorite color is glitter.’ That is something my little girl said when she was about three – she’s turning six now. Ever since they were little I started watching, ‘What makes them laugh?’ ‘Why are they laughing?’ ‘What is it about their favorite cartoon that they like?’ And then I try to apply that so that the show appeals to both boys and girls. A fun fact is that 60% of our audience is actually boys. I often have parents come up to me like, “My little boy watches Shimmer and Shine…!” and they’re so confused by it! But it’s all about fun characters, and action adventure, and magic – so why not!
I developed the show out of things that I like. Everybody always asks me, ‘are you Shimmer or Shine?’ And I say, ‘Well, I look like a Shimmer and act like a Shine.’ I’m the girl who likes to get dressed up but also climb the mountain before she comes in to work. So it’s a balance, which is what’s in the show too.”
Farnaz also talked about balancing message and entertainment in a show for young kids:
“If I wouldn’t let my kids watch it…I do try to keep it where the morals and the messages are always good, the girls are always supportive of each other, they never put each other down, and they always work together as a team to accomplish what’s going on. That’s always in the back of our heads. And one thing we keep an eye on is Zeta, our bad guy, to make sure she’s not too bad because we don’t want her to just be mean. We’re very conscious of those things as we’re writing and developing.”
We also discussed resilience, which is a theme of the show:
“It’s a huge quality that I have; I just didn’t realize that I had it! If I didn’t have it, I wouldn’t be here. Because development is not easy. I always say, ‘You’d better be prepared to get knocked down, punched while you’re down, and then get up and say, ‘Absolutely, what’s next?” Because it’s never easy. Getting to this place was a lot of work, and it was very difficult, but I’m grateful for every minute of it. It made me stronger and it made me wiser, and it made me tougher. That’s just who I am.”
Regarding advice for those wanting to get into the business, Farnaz advised:
“Be humble. Be eager. Soak up as much as you can. There are things to learn all around you every day. You just have to be open to it. Never stop growing. I always hope to not be the smartest person in the room. I want to be surrounded by people who know more than me, because that’s exciting!
It really comes down to you. You’re going to hear no more often than yes. You need to be able to not take it personally. I think that’s a big thing for a lot of artists. You put so much of yourself into everything that you do, so it’s hard not to take it personally. But you have to be able to disconnect yourself from what you submit, take a step back, and try to understand, ‘Okay, they don’t like this. Why don’t they like it? What is it about it that needs to adjust? What are they reacting to?’ And to be able to look at it as an outsider, not as yourself looking at your work in a precious manner.”
Finally, Farnaz shared that the show has been picked up for a fourth season, during which they plan to explore some new locations within the Shimmer and Shine world. We had a great chat, and you can listen to the whole discussion here https://soundcloud.com/emilyesse/2017-nickelodeon-studio-tour-farnaz-esnaashari-charmatz-interview.
While I was in Shimmer-and-Shine-land, I also got to actually sit in on part of a recording session. It was so neat to see some behind-the-scenes action as one of its lead voice actresses recorded different inflections for script lines and the folks in the recording booth selected which versions to use. And although I’ve always known that being a voice actor must be a lot of fun, this gave me a first-hand look at the patience that is also required as the actor goes through lines several times, and the way that she has to be continually “on,” performing in the booth for long stretches. And, of course, it gave me a first-hand look at how amazing the voice actors and directors are – because all of the readings were good in their various ways, and yet once the director had chosen a reading I could see why that variation was the one chosen. It was clear just from the short time I was sitting there how uniquely talented these folks who create the Nickelodeon shows we love really are.
But much as I loved watching the live recording, we had to move on eventually, because what would a visit to Nickelodeon be without stopping in to see one of my favorite executive producers, Ciro Nieli of TMNT? Since TMNT is in its last season (noooooo!!), Ciro may soon be moving on to other projects (which are currently unknown, but I’m sure whatever he does next will be excellent), but his office was still packed with Turtles merch (including a manhole-cover pillow I coveted), horror movie posters, and an actual spinner-rack of comics (I wonder if anyone would mind if I planted one of those in my office…). The halls around were plastered with Turtles posters, concept sketches, and other cool art (including little Mousers someone had drawn on the white boards). And down the hall was a full-sized version of the actual in-show arcade game that the Turtles have in their lair. How freaking cool is that??
Visiting the studio was such a blast. It was a real experience to pull back the curtain a bit on how great cartoon shows and interactive experiences are developed; and as always, a pleasure to speak with some of the talented creative minds behind it all. Thanks, Nickelodeon, for giving me a little peek into your world (and check out my full set of photos here!
And fortunately, for anyone who is going to San Diego Comic Con this week, you can get a little bit of this experience too. Nickelodeon’s nostalgia-themed San Diego booth and panels were a favorite part of my SDCC experience last year, and I’ve been wondering what we’ll see from them this year. It turns out this year’s experience will focus on Rocko’s Modern Life, Hey Arnold!, SpongeBob SquarePants and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles!
Every day of the convention, Nickelodeon’s booth (#4113) will feature a 23-foot-tall pineapple, housing an interactive gaming experience which will allow fans to step inside the world of SpongeBob SquarePants, TMNT, or The Loud House (after my recent VR experience, I definitely want to try this!); a life-size replica of Helga’s shrine from Hey Arnold!; a retail area featuring a custom t-shirt station and one-of-a-kind, exclusive collectibles (I need the sepia-toned Avatar Aang statue!); costumed-character appearances; and autograph signings with the voice casts and creators from Rocko’s Modern Life, Hey Arnold!, SpongeBob SquarePants and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Nick animation creators Butch Hartman (The Fairly OddParents), Chris Savino (The Loud House) and Billy Lopez (Welcome to the Wayne), and more.
Nickelodeon will also present four panels during the convention: Rocko’s Modern Life: Return to Earth!, a reunion with the original voice actors and sneak peek at the upcoming TV special (Thursday); Hey Arnold!: From Hillwood to the Jungle!, celebrating the return of the beloved characters in the upcoming TV movie with past and present casts and a live musical performance (Friday); Tales of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, a dive into the thrilling story arcs in season five (Friday); and SpongeBob SquarePants: The Legend of Boo-kini Bottom, a behind-the-scenes look at the new stop-motion Halloween special, along with a live table read of a classic episode picked by fans via social media (Saturday). The panels will feature the likes of Carlos Alazraqui, Tom Kenny, Charlie Adler, Ciro Nieli, Stan Sakai, Sean Astin, Rob Paulsen, Greg Cipes, Eric Bauza, Carolyn Lawrence, Bill Fagerbakke, Rodger Bumpass, and many more.
Whew! So much excitement had, and so much more coming up. I can’t wait to get into some more Nickelodeon fun at the San Diego Comic-Con. If you’re going, check it out, and maybe I’ll see you there! Be sure to say hi!
I’m celebrating San Diego Comic-Con this week by reading some new comics. As you may remember, Constant Reader, this is something I try to do all the time.
Last week, among the new titles I picked up was Calexit, which caused varying political outrage because people thought it was a commentary on Trump (maybe it is!) but I liked because it reminded me of two of my favoritemovies.
I also bought Skin & Earth, which is apparently based on a music video and I didn’t even know that was still a thing, unless you are Beyonce and you rule the universe.
Anyway, I liked these titles, but they are both the beginnings of multi-part stories and I don’t feel like I have enough insight yet to say anything pithy about them. If, from these columns, you think we have similar tastes, you might want to check them out.
I’ve also been reading some old comics in a different format. I missed a few titles at my local comic book store that I wanted to read, so I downloaded them onto my iPad. At the same time, I read two prose books on paper, something I have done rarely since falling in love with my Kindle, nearly a decade ago.
Reading is weird.
One of the things I like about reading comics is the act of turning the page. A good creative team knows how to play with this physical reality by pacing the story so that there is a cliff-hanger every time. This doesn’t have to be life-or-death on every page. Sometimes one character asks a question and the reader doesn’t discover the answer until the page is turned. Sometimes the story demands a two-page spread, so there is one less page to turn.
Using my finger to swipe the page is less suspenseful. Of the comics I read, there were no two-page spreads. There were also no ads until after the story finished, so I was never taken out of my fictional world.
And the colors! The colors glowed!
If I had wanted to, I could have manipulated the size of the panels, changing the way I perceived the page. I don’t want to do this. Now that I have the giant-size iPad, I don’t have to do this to be able to read the story.
The backlit screen on my Kindle Paperwhite is one of my favorite features. It means I can read in bed without a reading lamp, so I don’t have to turn anything off to go to sleep. My absolute favorite thing about my Kindle, however, is that it’s a compact, lightweight way to take dozens of books with me everywhere I go. It even fits in my purse!
Hardcover books don’t do those things. Hardcover books can be heavy, and I can’t adjust the size of the type when my eyes get tired and I want bigger print. Hardcover books require me to move my arms, a lot.
With all of this, I had forgotten the very real, physical pleasures to be had sitting in a comfy chair with a heavy book in my lap. I had forgotten how grounded this could feel. It made what I was reading feel more important, perhaps because they were non-fiction.
There are people who think one format is morally superior to another, and I am not one of them. If you like paper, read paper! If you like electronic books, read electronic books!
It was delightful to switch it up for a bit. More than ever, I know that there is no way to read or buy books that I don’t like.
Last month, I read a book called Hawkeye, Vol. 1
. This month, I hit one called Vol. 3. In the annoyingly typical way of Big Two comics, the latter follows directly from the former. (One is a hardcover, which in comics-reprinting circles comes typically a year or two after the paperback and combines two paperbacks together. Yes, that’s the opposite of how we old-time book-industry hands are used to seeing things happen, but it seems to work for the Wednesday Crowd.)
Anyway, at the end of Vol. 1, the two Hawkeyes split up, because comics are all about break-ups and changes and new things that can last for six issues or so. (Spider-Man No More! once again.) L.A. Woman
follows the younger female Hawkeye, Kate Bishop, who drives a cool car cross country to the city of the title, where she immediately gets caught up in nefarious doings and skulduggery of her own. Presumably there’s a Vol. 4 that features what Hawkguy was doing at the same time back in NYC, and that seems to be about as long as this particular set-up ran.
Kate’s travails form yet another “gritty” and “realistic” superhero comic — no powers, no flying, more-or-less the real world — that descends from the Miller/Mazzuchelli “Born Again” run in Daredevil, the major cliche in this area. Look, comics folks, we all know it’s not hard to put a bullet in someone’s head. And people without superpowers who repeatedly annoy large-scale criminals without actually jailing those criminals find themselves possessors of those bullets-in-the-head sooner rather than later. So talking-killer scenes, and repeated hairsbreadth escapes in noirish colors, just lampshade how artificial your story is. Avoid them. If your villain isn’t going to actually try to kill the hero like an actual criminal would in a real world, don’t go down that road and pretend that the plan is to kill her. We all know that’s not the case.
Speaking of which…Kate runs afoul of a supervillain carefully tailored to her abilities, one who can stymie her and cause her great pain but not blow her away instantly or hire goons to kidnap and murder her family by the snap of her fingers. So she’s in L.A., and she Loses Everything.
That’s OK, comics characters Lose Everything roughly once a year — it’s one of their major shticks. But she’s young and a fairly new character, so this is one of her first Lose Everythings, and it has that element of novelty to it.
By the end of this book, she’s Voluntarily Relinquished Everything — the next step towards Getting Everything Back, And Even Better, Because She’s The Good Guy — and is heading off for the vengeance and catharsis that probably got sidetracked and muted by some stupid crossover or other.
These are good superhero comics, for all that they’re drenched in cliches. It’s not quite as good as the Clint Barton stuff in the earlier issues, maybe because he’s easier to make a sad-sack in the first place. But “good superhero comics” is perilously close to damning with faint praise, along the lines of “a perfectly serviceable category Regency.” I wish readers and creators could aim higher, but that’s life.
If you like stories about superheroes who can’t jump over buildings with a single bound, and like to pretend that such people are “realistic,” you will probably enjoy the stories that Matt Fraction wrote about the various Hawkeyes. This time out, the opening story is drawn by Javier Pulido and the rest by Annie Wu, who are both good at the moderately gritty, real-people thing in their own ways. Go for it: I can’t stop you.
Fasten your seatbelts. It’s going to be a bumpy night. • Bettie Davis, All About Eve, 1950
Well, maybe it’ll be a bumpy night. I mean, I’m just beginning this column. How do I know how it’ll turn out? Do I look like a prophet to you?
Okay, onward! One confession, coming up:
I am not going to continue to duck, dodge, elude, evade, ditch or even do an end run around something I should have dealt with months ago.
But… where to begin?
Before beginning, let me present to you, at no extra charge, what I imagine my delinquency concerning the matter that may be the subject of this column – it’s still early – would look like, if it existed, which it doesn’t.
...a shard of mirror, jagged and pointed and sharp, thrust into my soul stuff…
Please don’t ask me to describe “soul stuff” I’m not even sure souls exist, much less how they might appear to us. And would they appear the same way to, say, a gehinkle from the planet Blookish in the Maxima Centaur system?
A shout from the balcony. “What’s that?” I ask, cupping my ear (because I am, you know, a bit hard of hearing.) This balcony bound creature – a gehinkle? – says that I am procrastinating! Not coming to terms with the problem that lies buried in my soul.
Well, bite your snerditch, gutless gehinkle! We shall engage the matter…pretty doggone soon.
(By the way…gehinkles really don’t have guts. Just thought you should know.)
Now, where were we? – bumpy nights… snarky aliens…improvised punctuation? Oh, wait! This thing that’s been eating my lunch these past few weeks! (Full disclosure: “eating my lunch,” as it’s used above, is a locution I swiped from that excellent novelist, James Lee Burke. {You did want to know that, didn’t you?}
Speaking of lunch – I should have some. A guy needs his nourishment! I’ll take a break and get back to you.
That wasn’t exactly haute cuisine, was it? Gourmets are well advised to give Chateau O’Neil a pass. But it keeps the stomach walls from bumping into each other and that’s all we ask.
Back to today’s topic. But before we get to the gist of it, I’m wondering if I should issue a Spoiler Alert here. What’s the protocol? Not that leaving a Spoiler Alert unissued would actually ruin anything, though I can’t be sure of that. Is it better to be safe than sorry? (Have you ever noticed that life can be difficult?)
Another quandary. Is this an appropriate place to reveal the title? (And oh my gosh! Is telling you that what I’ll get around to discussing any paragraph now has a title ruining anything for you? Have I let a cat out of a bag? I mean, if you know something has a title you can figure out that it’s not, say, a battleship. Have we narrowed the possibilities too much?)
I’ve glanced at the bottom of the screen and can you believe it? Already 438 words? I’d better not waste any more of your time,
The Perils of Captain Mighty and the Salvation of Danny the Kid.
Following the first set of pens celebrating the great houses in Game of Thrones, Montegrappa has issued a new series of limited edition Iron Throne pens. Capturing the essence of the most coveted seat in Westeros, the Iron Throne pens will provide fans with a talisman to cherish.
The Iron Throne Pen
To represent the intricacies and complexities of the Iron Throne itself, Montegrappa’s artisans have fashioned a cap formed of overlapping swords representing the seven kingdoms. Their hilts rise above the cap’s top to create a crown, the pommels and blades running the length of the cap itself. Standing proud is a sword that serves as the pocket clip, its hilt bearing a fiery red ruby.
At the cap’s top, surrounded by the swords’ hilts, is the Game of Thrones logo. Along the pen’s barrel, artwork in die-cast, polished and burnished precious metal represents the saga through symbols evocative of the houses, from dragons to stags.
Details of the pen are enriched with Flaming White celluloid. Game of Thrones: The Iron Throne Pen is limited to 300 fountain pens and 300 rollerball pens in Sterling Silver, denoting the year of settlement of the last of the Targaryen Kings (300AC). Seven exclusive fountain and rollerball pens cast in solid 18k gold represent the number of Kingdoms. The fountain pen is piston fed, with nib traditionally made in 18k gold, engraved with the image of the throne itself.
I’m honestly not sure why these Planet of the Apes prequels work so well. On paper they’re a disaster: a trilogy of prequels to a movie that while historically significant is not relevant in the modern era except for having a famous twist ending everyone knows. Every movie sets itself up as a conflict between humans and apes and the titles reveal that the humans don’t stand much of a chance. They work because there’s a real heart here, there are great performances from both humans and CGI apes. Everyone in War for the Planet of the Apes cares about the stakes so much that you can’t help but be completely invested. These movies are beacons of earnestness in a cynical, sarcastic, landscape.
There’s a lot of plot in War and I’m not sure it’s all necessary. Head ape Caesar (Andy Serkis) wants to lead his people out of the woods they’ve been living in since the last movie because it’s suddenly untenable. There is word of some paradise out past the desert and the apes plan to move out. I don’t want to spoil any of the emotional beats but Caesar ends up not going with the rest of the apes and instead goes with the only two characters I remember from the last movie and a newcomer and try to hunt down the colonel leading the aggressive human military (Woody Harrelson). The colonel is afraid of a disease that is somehow taking higher brain function away from humans and this has put him at odds with other human factions. This all ties together with a rescued human girl who has the disease and an awfully depressing ape concentration camp.
That’s a lot of story even for two and a half hours. War wants to linger in the bigger moments, and it should— those are absolutely the strongest parts of the film— but it ends up throwing away good stuff. The whole illness plot builds to the predictable end, the colonel contracts the disease and kills himself, but it happens with 20 minutes left in the movie and I don’t think it affected the outcome. By taking the disease bit out of the climax and making it basically inconsequential all it actually does is give us a cop out for Caesar’s journey of revenge. He doesn’t have to decide to kill the colonel. Maybe the disease just exists to explain why the humans in the original Planet of the Apes couldn’t talk but that’s such a long way to go for something that no one really cared about in a movie from 1968.
This is a well-directed movie, a gorgeously shot movie, and the series features some of the best CGI acting I’ve ever seen. Andy Serkis has been doing this for a decade but he’s amazing at doing performance capture. I wouldn’t give him an Oscar for this part (it just isn’t nuanced enough) but it shouldn’t be discounted because of the medium. In an era when it seems like all of the big budget action movies are jockeying to show how little their leads can care about anything, the Planet of the Apes franchise is going the other way. Everyone in this movie cares a lot all the time. There’s a family-like relationship here that is exactly like the one Fast & Furious would tell you they have, but here they show it instead. I want these apes to feel happy and know peace even though in the fiction that means the death of most of the humans. This movie has me rooting against my own people.
I understand that they have plans to make as many as two more in this series and as much as I enjoyed this one I sort of wish they would stop. I don’t know how to escalate from here. The last movie has a well-meaning human who was pushed too far. This one had an actually evil human pushed too far. I don’t want to see them try to heighten past ape concentration camps. It’s either time to get in to the minutia of building an ape society (and maybe don’t try that) or it’s time for Charlton Heston to fall from the sky. (I suppose it could be time for Mark Wahlberg to fall from the sky but gross.) I want this series to stop feeling like it’s spinning its wheels and while the end of this one suggests they’re sensitive to that problem I’m ready to just get to it being a planet of apes by now.
Karen Reyes is ten years old in 1968, and she loves monsters. Monster movies, monster magazines, the idea of monsters — imagining that there are real monsters around her in her normal Chicago life. She’s also seriously bullied and outcast, with no real close friends as the book begins. And she’s telling us her own story, drawing it page-by-page in a series of notebooks, with herself as a kid-werewolf PI in fedora and trenchcoat.
But My Favorite Thing Is Monsters
is not cute. And it’s also not the kind of book where the reader understands the truth of what’s opaque to the narrator, like The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time. Karen is young, and there’s a lot of things she doesn’t know, and she does want to become a movie-monster, but she’s mostly clear-eyed about the world around her, and she’s good at finding things out and piecing things together. (She will make a good detective when she grows up.)
And her upstairs neighbor, Anka Silverberg, did just die — shot in the heart in her living room, though found dead in her bed. Since the apartment was locked at the time, the police have closed the case quickly as a suicide. But Anka has deep secrets from her life in Berlin before and during WW II — and she’s not the only one with secrets in the building, from her musician husband to the minor-gangster landlord and his hot-to-trot-wife, to the ventriloquist in the basement and Karen’s twenty-something amateur-gigolo brother Deez and hillbilly mother.
Karen does meet some other kids who she sees as monsters, or possible monsters. And one of those may not be entirely a real person who actually exists in the world. So there’s some unreliable-narrator elements, or fabulist elements, in the mix as well. But, at her core, Karen is honest and straightforward: she’s trying to find out the truth, and has some good tools for doing so.
The truth — which doesn’t all come out in this book, the first of at least two — looks to be bigger and more dangerous and complicated than one ten-year-old girl can fix. And her family has clearly been trying to keep some big secrets from her, like Deez’s relationship with Anka.
I’ve tagged this book as “Fantasy,” but I don’t think it really is. But it’s a book about the fantasies that we have, and about how fantasy creatures can make real life bearable.
All that is told as if drawn by Karen — don’t think too hard about when she has the time to draw this much, or how she got this good at the age of ten — in colored pens on pages lined in blue, to mimic a notebook. There’s around five hundred of those pages, though none of them are numbered, and there are a lot of words on many of these large pages. My Favorite Thing Is Monsters is a big book in every way: physically large, full of words, impressive pictorially, challenging in subject matter and storytelling.
This is Emil Ferris’s first book — she’s a woman about the age Karen Reyes would be, grown up, and she seems to have been a kid like Karen back in the late ’60s. I have no idea how many of the elements of Monsters came out of Ferris’s own life, real or transmuted over time, but I can say that Monsters is nothing like a memoir. It is a fully-formed story, about a deeply individual young woman, stuck in a bad situation — several bad situations, overlapping — and trying to cope with it through intellect and rational thought and just a bit of wishing.
It’s a very impressive graphic novel. Several dozen more influential people have said that before me, and they’re all very right. Debuts like this don’t come around very often. This is something very special.
I have a leg in each of two worlds, having spent half of my life living in the Chicagoland area and the other half living in the New York metropolitan area, a.k.a. “The Big Apple” so don’t give me any shit about the word “Chicagoland.” New Yorkers have a problem when it comes to comparisons with other cities, particularly the so-called Windy one, named by a New York newspaper editor who previously held the same position in Chicago. And he wasn’t referring to the weather, but to the native approach to political negotiation.
The fastest way for a New Yorker and a Chicagoan to get into an argument is to say the word “pizza.” Second to that: “hot dogs.” But as they say, the proof is in the pudding. Whereas it is well-known that I loathe airlines and airports, the real reason I drive between the Atlantic Northeast and the Inter-Ocean so frequently is that I am compelled to bring back six to twelve pounds of Vienna hot dogs, also known as the Chicago dog, back to over a half-dozen jonesing New Yorkers.
One of the best-known elements of the Chicago hot dog experience is that it is never served – to adults – with ketchup. There have been several books written about this. My landsmen will tell you it’s disgusting and it hides the taste of the sausage.
Of course, that’s bullshit. The traditional Chicago dog is served with mustard, onions (raw or grilled), tomato, relish, a pickle spear, peppers and the most important ingredient: a dash of celery salt. Really, put ketchup on that and nobody will notice – other than Chicagoans. When the famed Nathan’s opened a store in Chicago, they told CBS that their hot dogs do not need all that crap. The reporter, who was not from the Midwest, responded: “but isn’t the traditional Nathan’s hot dog served with sauerkraut?” Nathan’s Chicago store closed down in short order.
But this week the Heinz ketchup company decided enough is enough. There’s money they’re not making in the Windy City, and they need to raise consciousness. They’ve started marketing a concoction called “Chicago Dog Sauce” and, today – National Hot Dog Day – Heinz is giving away an abattoir full of Chicago dogs with the stuff. They even made a cute little video about it.
It’s a very clever gag and a brilliant promotion campaign. If they’re thinking it will cause a major shift in local taste… well, I’m sure they do not. Not even Donald Trump is that stupid. Oh, screw that: Trump eats New York thin crust pizza with a knife and fork, even while in New York City!
It has widely reported that the phrase “hot dog” was the creation of turn-of-the-last-century cartoonist T.A.D. Dorgan. This may be apocryphal – and that Windy City origin might be as well. The National Hot Dog and Sausage Council reports “Some say the word was coined in 1901 at the New York Polo Grounds on a cold April day. Vendors were hawking hot dogs from portable hot water tanks shouting “They’re red hot! Get your dachshund sausages while they’re red hot!” A New York Journal sports cartoonist, Tad (sic) Dorgan, observed the scene and hastily drew a cartoon of barking dachshund sausages nestled warmly in rolls. Not sure how to spell ‘dachshund’ he simply wrote ‘hot dog!’ The cartoon is said to have been a sensation, thus coining the term “hot dog.”
The sausage itself was invented in Vienna Austria in 1487, it gathered national attention in America at the Columbian Exposition in Chicago in 1893, and the hot dog bun was invented at the St. Louis World’s Fair of 1904. Doubtlessly, German and Austrian immigrants were selling these puppies throughout North America during their great immigration throughout the latter half of the 19th Century, suggesting the hot dog was popularized by anarchists.
I realize the Heinz stunt is simply that: a clever promotion and nothing more. I’d be mildly surprised to see their Chicago Dog Sauce on the shelves of the local Jewel Foods chain when I’m next out there buying hot dogs for New Yorkers, but I would not be surprised in the least if it were to be available as a condiment option at the Vienna Sausage company store.
O.K. You can tell the vegans they can come back now.
The much-anticipated epic space adventure Valerian: City of Alpha is now live on iOS and Google Play. And thanks to our friends at STX Films, we have one of their limited edition mouse pads to give away.
The mobile game begins 590 years earlier when Alpha is still just a space station. The aim is to explore and discover the aliens and planets that will come to be featured in the movie. Players must complete exciting missions, connect with alien species and come up with strategies to help them create the knowledge-sharing metropolis. The ultimate objective is building for themselves the biggest and best version of the City of Alpha.
Notes:
About the Film:
