Tagged: Spider-Man

So we’re more than half-way through Secret Invasion, the event that’s supposed to be the biggest thing to rock the Marvel Universe since Civil War, where the question was “whose side are you on?” Secret Invasion’s question is “who do you trust?”, which is almost the same question as Civil War’s but not as grammatically correct ( it’s "whom", people!) and concerns the revelation that several Skrulls (shape-shifting aliens who’ve had their asses kicked many times) have secretly been living among us for a while. This story is the brain-child of Brian Michael Bendis, who has been praised for his series Powers and his run on Ultimate Spider-Man and who has been writing New Avengers and Mighty Avengers since both titles were created.

This plot has been done before to lesser degrees. In the early 90s, the Fantastic Four discovered that the Human Torch’s wife had been impersonated by a Skrull since before they were even engaged. And a couple of years later, the X-Men found out that Wolverine had been replaced by a Skrull who then died because he didn’t know he didn’t have Wolvie’s powers too (idiot).

But there are three major elements that mark this particular invasion story as different from what we’ve seen in comic books a million times over. The first element is that what’s left of the Skrull Empire has now taken up religion. Their holy texts tell them that Earth is theirs by right and they have become quite creepy by habitually saying “He loves you” to everyone they attack. Secondly, they’ve learned how to infiltrate us in such a way that they are now beyond the detection of super-powers, magic and technology – very scary in this post-9/11 world. Finally, the Skrulls have finally figured out how to produce super-powers on a large scale. Where once the Super-Skrull and Power Skrull were unique, now there are thousands of Skrull warriors who have the combined powers of many different villains and heroes.

But how’s the execution? Well, in a nutshell, the main series started off very strong and has recently picked up steam again full force. Even when it was slow, it had some great scenes. But these are over-shadowed occasionally by pages of wasted space and repetitive recaps. And out of the eleven tie-in issues Bendis has written so far, eight of them can be ignored or have a smidge of substance that’s surrounded by filler pages.

But if you are one of those unfortunate souls who bought all the New Avengers and Mighty Avengers tie-ins and then realized you’d wasted over twenty bucks, don’t worry! Just do what I and my good friend Lisa McMullan did. With a little creativity, you can take those pages and make yourself a very smart looking jacket! Now you’re not a sucker, you are actually quite fashionable!

Don’t believe me? Just look at this photographic evidence, nay-sayer! All you need is scissors, tape and maybe an hour of free time.

And when people ask you "How did you think to make such a snazy and debonair sport coat?", you can simply say "I got the idea from those crazy guys at ComicMix and Alan ‘the Sizzler’ Kistler. He’s one nutty guy, that Sizzler."

Not a bad series, but I definitely have some criticisms. Hmmm? What’s that? You want more detail about what my problems are with the main series and the Bendis-written tie-ins? Not a problem, folks. That’s what I get paid for.

By the way, folks, if it pleases you, feel free to check out my old list of the Six Worst Moments in Skrull History!

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