9 Superpowers You Might Actually Want

Glenn Hauman

Glenn is VP of Production at ComicMix. He has written Star Trek and X-Men stories and worked for DC Comics, Simon & Schuster, Random House, arrogant/MGMS and Apple Comics. He's also what happens when a Young Turk of publishing gets old.

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15 Responses

  1. Richard Pachter says:

    My super powers (so far):*ordering Chinese food*making music compilations (a/k/a mixtapes)*keeping strolling musicians away at restaurants.

  2. Richard Pachter says:

    To me and my people, nothing, but most goyim lack that ability.

  3. Martha Thomases says:

    Teleportation. I've spent too much time in airports already.

  4. Richard Pachter says:

    You have that or want that, Martha?(If you already have it, what are you doing for lunch today? Up for some dim sum?)

    • Martha Thomases says:

      The headline leads me to believe we are suggesting powers we would want, powers useful in the real world. But, if anyone does have the ability to teleport, please let me know how it's done.

  5. Tony Isabella says:

    The ability to look at a parked car with a Bush/Cheney sticker and reduce it to a pile of parts with no two parts still connected. Just parked cars, though. I wouldn't want to cause any traffic accidents. That would be like the real Rapture…when all the people who voted for Bush are instantly transported to Hell.

  6. Elayne Riggs says:

    The late great Leah Adezio had Parking Spot Creation as one of her superpowers. She used to brag about how the Parking Gods loved her; now I guess she's one of them.My "mutant power" is being able to find a sushi restaurant near wherever I happen to be (I mostly hang out in cities), but that's since been superceded by my GPS. Robin's "mutant power" is to influence others at a group gathering to ordering Guinness after he's ordered one.As far as which powers I'd WANT, definitely teleportation and floating. Anything to alleviate the pain of walking at this point…

  7. Richard Pachter says:

    I'd like to fly.Without having my baggage lost. That would be good.

  8. Michael Davis says:

    I want the power to pimp slap stupid people.

  9. Kai says:

    Michael, I thought you had that one already?

  10. Craig Wood says:

    Sincerity detection — Either people are getting better at lying to me or I'm getting more cynical.