One is inevitably reminded of the story Harlan Ellison tells of the movie executive who wanted to remake the movie The Wiz, but recast with all white actors.
There was a time when Charlie Sheen wasn’t a crazed obsessive with a penchant for terrorizing people around him while avoiding the law, but only acted the part. Perhaps this is why, once upon a time, he was strongly considered for the Caped Crusader.
Harlan Ellison was an occasional film critic back in the ’80s with his column Harlan Ellison’s Watching, which ran in Cinema magazine, the Los Angeles Free Press, Starlog magazine, and The Magazine of Fantasy and Science Fiction, where he would leverage his knowledge of Hollywood to bring additional depth to his own commentary. And while writing his review of Batman in the October 1989 issue of The Magazine of Fantasy and Science Fiction (“Installment 36, In Which, Darkly and Deliciously, We Travel From Metropolis to Metropolis, Two Different Cities, Both Ominous”) he revealed that at one time Charlie Sheen was up for the role of Bruce Wayne/Batman, and didn’t get only because he was too young– he would have been 23 at the time of shooting.
Now, Charlie Sheen was obviously a capable actor then, as audiences saw in Platoon, Wall Street, and Eight Men Out. And he certainly could handle the physical aspects; he would soon start shooting Navy Seals. But this is the way of Hollywood, and he went on to other, shall we say, winning projects.
Still, he could still be associated with Batman– now he’s about the right age now to play the Riddler in The Dark Knight Rises. That could be a big draw for Warner Bros., who will probably need the revenue since they just lost the star of their biggest TV show, Two And A Half Men…
…oh. Never mind, then.
Thanks to Doug Lane and Barney Dannelke for research.
Glenn Hauman promised yesterday that I’d deliver a “fuller explanation of what’s been going on” vis-à-vis my piece “Welcome to Hollywood.” So in the interests of keeping this story alive (because you haven’t lived until you’ve heard the words, “You’ll never work in this town again”) I’ll try to squeeze in another few inches.
Jason Brice and his site Comics Bulletin (formerly Silver Bullet Comic Books) have run my “Meth Addict” (formerly “Past Masters”) column without interference since 2004. Among other things, the column was a linchpin in helping secure an important financial settlement for Dave Cockrum that allowed the X-Men co-creator to live his last few years in relative comfort. Good for you, Jason Brice. If we never do another good deed together again in our wretched little lives, that may have been enough.
The yanking of “Welcome to Hollywood” after CB’s EiC Jason Sacks (the other Jason) had already accepted it and promoted it was a joint decision between the two Jasons shortly after the column was live. I wasn’t in the room when things got weird, but I imagine the conversation was fairly tame and thoroughly professional and went something like this:
Jason: Are you crazy?!
Jason: Huh?
The pair discussed the matter and decided that what I’d written was a little too dangerous for CB. Jason Sacks then pulled the short straw and sent me the following: “Jason and I have decided to pull the column out of concerns about CB’s exposure to potential legal action.”
Within moments, the story was live at Harlan Ellison’s site (“Read it…love it,” wrote Harlan) with offers from others, including comics pros Tony Isabella and Michael Netzer, to re-post. I called Glenn H. because I particularly admired how he’d pointed to the competitive website’s initial story on his own front page. “Want it?” I asked. “Yup,” said Glenn.
Did the Jasons abandon Mr. Meth in his hour of needful spleen venting? Not hardly. “I want to emphasize that as the editor of the piece and editor-in-chief at ComicsBulletin I both support and encourage Cliff to do everything he can to expose the horrible acts of this scumbag,” writes Jason Sacks at Harlan Ellison’s website. “It sounds like Richard Saperstein is the exemplar of exactly the sort of lowdown ripoffs of creative types to whom Mr. Ellison has dispatched his most scathing scorn.”
In conclusion, I’m sure you agree that it would be a case of chronic irony if the story of how my column was pulled and reposted somehow obscured the far-more-important tale of what occurred with The Futurians movie, the Snaked movie, and my brief love affair with Richard Saperstein.
By Tony Isabella
Krause Publications, 272 pages. $29.99 retail.
I want to publicly thank Tony Isabella for taking on a task that is as courageous as it is, well, thankless. It’s hard to imagine a more difficult and a more controversial chore than recommending only 1000 comic
books you must read.
This shows you how clever Tony is. First of all, he recruited over 130 people to make suggestions, including me as well as a good chunk of the state of Ohio – past and present (Harlan Ellison and Maggie Thompson are and will always be honorary Ohioans). Second, instead of arranging them numerically, an act that would guarantee his assassination at the 2010 Mid-Ohio Con (although this would make for a good panel), he arranged everything by decade. Brilliant.
This book is, above and beyond everything else, great fun.
There are hundreds of books you’d expect, and even more that you might not. Of those, the ones you’ve read will make you go “oh, sure, of course.” Those you haven’t read – probably the awesome Jingle Jangle Comics, or Dick Briefer’s Frankenstein – you should. Don’t worry: the way stuff’s being reprinted, it’s just a matter of time.
Each choice is covered by the appropriate publishing and talent credits as well as a nice clean reproduction of the cover, along with Tony’s accompanying paragraph explaining what and why. To his overwhelming credit, Tony does not emphasize superheroes and heroic fantasy – Archie, Harvey, and Charlton get their due, and the various genres such as humor, children’s, and romance are well-covered.
The tome is well-designed and not the least bit pompous.
When Tony told me he had taking on this project, he headed me off by saying he was, obviously, crazy. Well, having poured over 1,000 Comic Books You Must Read, I’ve got to say “not so much, Tony. Maybe just a little bit.”
You’ll love it. It’ll make an excellent holiday present.
For any holiday. Go buy it.
We here at ComicMix would like to wish the happiest of birthdays to two of our favorite people:
Harlan Ellison, who despite various attempts directed at him of annihilation, assassination, bloodshed, butchery, carnage, destruction, foul play, homicide, knifing, liquidation, lynching, manslaughter, massacring, murder, shooting, stabbing, slaying, taking out, terrorism, general mayhem, and the rest of the works up to and including editing, has somehow survived to the distinguished age of 75. Happy birthday, unkie Harlan.
Mark Wheatley, who as far as we know has never been the object of anyone’s ire, and is the creator of Mars, Breathtaker, EZ Street, Lone Justice, andFrankenstein Mobster, turns 55 today. Celebrate by reading some of his great works today!
For years, Harlan has been one of the biggest contributors to the Comic Book Legal Defense Fund, which fights tirelessly against the forces of censorship against comics. This, however, is a bit more proactive: "The CBLDF is great as a first-response team after you’ve been hit, but as the saying goes, the best defense is a good offense. An offense with hammers and chainsaws and legbreakers named Vinnie and the best lawyers money can get. I’m tired of playing nice with these sewer dwellers."
Ellison says the new group’s mission will be two-fold.
"First, we’re going after the ignorant, sloppy, mean-spirited, graceless, moronic, self-involved, naive, bigoted, and probably plague-infected pinheads who are looking to make comics their new excuse for a witchhunt, like that blond harpy who thinks if she insults enough comics she’ll get a job on Fox and Friends. Second, we’re going to be working with comics creators and performing random sales audits on books, to see if they’re being shafted out of royalties. There are only a handful of distribution outlets, and the biggest buy the books on a non-returnable basiss. It can’t be that hard to get accurate numbers. If we have any time left over, we’ll also investigate claims of illegal or unethical contracts, work-for-hire violations, evidence of contract violation by editors and publishers, misuse of royalty statements and funds, and other complaints of professional concern."
"And if I’m lucky, Paramount will start up a comics division that I can go after. Mwah-hah-hah-haaaah!" Then the laughter, and Harlan, vanished in a cloud of smoke.
Other members of the CBLOF board will be Dave Sim, Trina Robbins, Larry Hama, Mike Diana, and Not-So-Friendly Frank.
Back from a long break, crazy deadlines, and other fun stuff… and, man, it didn’t take long for my windows to stay open again, particularly with the new version of Firefox. So, what’s keeping my browser from running well?
Scarlett Johannson tells you to get on your knees. Jamie King tells you to come to her. Sarah Paulson tells you to keep the mask on. Man, the Spirit movie is going to be kinky. Hubba-hubba.
Wonder Woman finds a dead body in the Potomac. Cue the Jack C. Harris cred– what? It really happened?
If you’re using Verizon to read alt.binaries.comics, you’ve got until Thursday before Verizon shuts off your access. I’m cancelling my service over it, how about you?
Seven years ago today in Atlanta, Peter David and Kathleen O’Shea got married in the chapel at Emory University. Harlan Ellison delivered a best man speech that was only slightly shorter than his fourth marriage, topping off a beautiful ceremony.
Happy Copper Anniversary, you two crazy kids. Enjoy the night.
This was my week to consider the lives of little old Jewish men. On Tuesday, I went to a screening of Dreams with Sharp Teeth, a film about Harlan Ellison, where I was lucky enough to talk to the man himself.
On Wednesday, there was a memorial service for Norman Mailer at Carnegie Hall. If Mailer was there, it was, alas, in spirit only, and in the lives of those who read his work.
What struck me about these two events is that both men were bullied. Harlan talked about a group of boys who would beat him up every day after school. Mailer, a Jew at Harvard in the late 1930s and early 1940s, certainly was shunned more than his share. It was the era of John Wayne and Gary Cooper, Cary Grant and Jimmy Stewart. A man like Dustin Hoffman could no more be a leading man – a hero – than Larry Fine.
As one would expect, boys who experience cruelty grow up to be fighters. Both men have reputations for being opinionated, biting, passionate in their defense of their positions. Both have been known to throw a punch, physically as well as verbally.
And yet – they also both grew up to be charming men. Maybe my perceptions are flawed because I met them in the 1970s, when they were no longer young, but I don’t think so. I think they learned to be charming for the same reasons they learned to fight. Charm, with the sense of humor that so often tags along, is a great way to ingratiate oneself to people. Including bullies.
Girls can also be bullies, but of a different kind. I’m sure there are girls who beat up smaller kids, but it’s more likely that girls will bond together to exclude those they would ridicule. The bully is as likely to be the most beautiful, or the most popular, not the most physically strong. And, again, their victims learn to be charming.
Charm is the weapon of the outsider. There are many studies that demonstrate, for example, that women’s intuition is, in fact, a learned trait, that women learn to observe more men more closely than men observe women, because women have been more dependent on men’s approval, and need to keep tabs. African-Americans similarly know more about how white people will react than vice versa.
Bullies think they are hurting their victims. A punch in the face (or the kidney, or the knee) certainly hurts. At the same time, the bully’s victim learns to develop his own weapons. Perhaps she learns to hide meekly, and find a roundabout way home from school. Or he learns to find an adult or a bigger bully who can act as protector. Luckily for us, many develop a sense of humor or a winning smile or another talent that keeps away the pain.
For the artist, bullying can result in an empathy for underdogs of every kind, and the ability to understand different kinds of characters and situations. The best writers feel like outsiders and underdogs. Their work takes us to new worlds and lets us live new lives. Their success is the best revenge.
Martha Thomases, Media Goddess of ComicMix, is a real fan of the movie, My Bodyguard.
[EDITOR’S NOTE: This is taken from Harlan Ellison’s online community, reproduced in its unedited entirety. If there’s one person whose words you don’t change without checking with him, it’s Harlan. — GH]
HARLAN ELLISON ON THE WRITERS STRIKE SETTLEMENT
YOU HAVE MY PERMISSION TO RE-POST THIS ANYWHERE:
Creds: got here in 1962, written for just about everybody, won the Writers Guild Award four times for solo work, sat on the WGAw Board twice, worked on negotiating committees, and was out on the picket lines with my NICK COUNTER SLEEPS WITH THE FISHE$$$ sign. You may have heard my name. I am a Union guy, I am a Guild guy, I am loyal. I fuckin’ LOVE the Guild.
And I voted NO on accepting this deal.
My reasons are good, and they are plentiful; Patric Verrone will be saddened by what I am about to say; long-time friends will shake their heads; but this I say without equivocation…