MICHAEL DAVIS Is Bringing Sexy Back
In fact, I’m so far away from being a prude the next level in my open mindedness would be to become a prude.
I’ve met a lot of prudes in my life and nothing makes a prude more prudish than their views on sex.
Me? As long as it does not include kids or animals I say what ever floats your boat sexually, have at it. You would have to be into some sick shit (kids, animals, Republicans) to disgust me.
I’m not quite at the point that I’m disgusted by the depiction of some women in superhero comics but I’m far from all right with it and have not been all right with it for a while now. It’s just a real turn off to me and it’s also one of the reasons a lot of people still think comics are juvenile fare at best.
The depiction of super titty women is not something I consider as important to be concerned about like some sicko who’s into gerbil love or some other crazy action. I guess for the most part absolutely unrealizable depictions of women with breasts as big as a weather balloons is harmless, except for giving young men a bullshit unrealistic view of women and demeaning women in all sorts of ways. But other than that, it’s harmless.
But-that does seem to be what the audience wants, though it seems to me the 38 double-D tits, tiny waist and banging booty that appear to be the preeminent portrayal of women in comics is just silly in this day and age. Yeah, I can hear the decades old ridiculous argument “they are drawn that way for the 15-year-old boy audience.”
Really? So those 15-year old boys are not into the guys in tights that beat up on other guys in tights, which is the reason most superhero comics exist? So doing away with the big titty women would result in those 15-year old boys no longer reading about the men in tights who like to pound other men in tights?
Oh, wait a sec.
Perhaps the reason for the big titty women is to insure that no conservative family value group complains that comics are nothing but guys in tights pounding each other.
That can’t happen. It would destroy the sanity of marriage.
So I guess we are stuck with the 15-year-old boy defense for the reason that big titty superhero women are on the rag…I mean all the rage!
Heh.
That defense is weaker than OJ’s but it’s working just as well I guess. It’s the cop out of all cop-outs and artists who spin that line are just wrong or really horny.
I mean really.
The only thing that’s possibly worst than comic’s big titty women are the big titty women in some video games. Have you seen Catwoman in Mortal Combat VS. The DC Universe? She looks like a porn star that has seen way too many one eyed monsters. I mean…damn.
I often wonder what the wives and girlfriends of the artists who draw big titty super women think. But then again, maybe that’s the problem. Maybe most of these guys have no wife or girlfriend. Maybe they just need to get laid.
Well if that’s the case I’m not here to judge, I’m here to help. Follow the steps below and your pent up frustrations will soon be a thing of the past.
Step 1. Go to a bar.
Step 2: Buy the ugliest or the fattest girl a drink or seven.
Step 3. Get real drunk yourself.
Step 4. Take her home.
Step 5. Tap that.
Note: for even faster action, buy a fat and ugly girl the drinks.
This works. Trust me. How do I know? It’s in the Newt Gingrich and Herman Cain handbook and just look how much tail those guys are getting.
On the very, very slim chance there is a woman artist out there drawing big titty women in comics the followings are steps that you can use to get laid.
Step 1. Go to a bar
Step 2. Look for the guy trying to get a fat or ugly woman (or both) drunk.
Step 3. Go up to him and just say “yes.”
Step 4. Let him take you home and “tap that.”
Step 5. In about two minutes after he is “tapped out,” leave and go home and work.
By the way, shame on you for being such a slut.
Look, kidding aside, I’m a big a fan of big titty women with tiny waist and banging booty as the next guy but I prefer real and not plastic.
That’s the problem with the way some artists depict woman. Their depictions just do not ring true.
Yes, I know that neither does a guy who comes from another planet and can bend steel in his bare hands and who, disguised as Clark Kent is tapping the ass of one of the few female characters who is not a big titty woman. I know that does not ring true either but that’s a non-truth I can live with.
The new guys would do well to take a page from some of the masters of comic book art. They took the time and effort to draw women with grace, style and attitude and those women were hot!
Gwen Stacy as drawn by John Romita Sr. is the hottest comic book woman character ever created bar none.
Who’s hotter? Nobody.
Gwen Stacy was not a superhero but she was still a piece of ass to beat any other piece of ass.
Female agents of SHIELD as drawn by Jim Steranko – hot!!! Nick Fury’s girlfriend Contessa Valentina Allegra de la Fontaine as drawn by Jim was sexy beyond words.
Jack Kirby’s Sue Storm was so fine that she was my second pretend girlfriend. The first was Gwen Stacy and the third was Laurie Partridge.
Yeah, I had a thing for white girls. I had to have a thing for white girls; there were no black women in comics or on TV for my 10-year-old self to develop a crush on.
I’m proud to say as a proud African American man, all my crushes now are of women of color…Asian.
What?
I don’t expect anything to change anytime soon with regards to super big titty woman but maybe some artist will read this and check out how the greats did women.
Give that a sec.
You know, if those comic book artists who draw those outlandish women would simply draw less big titty women the big titty women they did draw would become that much more of a sex symbol because she would be rare.
That would be sexy.
I miss you Gwen Stacy. I’m sad that the Green Goblin broke your neck.
That sucked.
WEDNESDAY: Mike Gold
Of course, devoted followers of Michael’s column know that Sexy never left….
Jarrod,
it left me plenty of times. You would think that in this day and age ‘going dutch’ would be OK.
When I was reading X-Men and such as a kid, my mother would jokingly ask if one of the powers of the women was to be able to fit into those tight outfits. I used to reply how it’s just a bonus (when I read the “Calvin&Hobbes” strip which made the same claims, I laughed).
Though I certainly admire the female form, I wouldn’t feel comfortable reading certain comics on the train to/from work nor really broadcast that I read comics. I don’t have anything to hide, except that based on the output nowadays most civilians would think I’m some sort of perv.
Also, this is bad business. Some commentators made a valid point how when the “Teen Titans” cartoon was on, it drew several million viewers (quite a few were young girls) and Starfire was a very popular character. Now that the years have passed and the girls are grown up; there isn’t much of a reason to read a comic featuring their once-favorite character who is pretty much now the opposite of how she was portrayed in the series. A lot of comics today are lucky to have sales numbers in the 5-figures. So much for latching on to the potentially wider market.
Jeremiah,
For the most part regarding superhero comics at least that “potentially wider market” train has left the station it seems. Pity.
Very true. When I see the publishers making attempts at trying to get readers outside the typical demographic, I get a bit cynical and think it’s nothing more than just lip service; especially when one higher-up at one the Big Two makes statements like “kids never read comics”.
Very true. When I see the publishers making attempts at trying to get readers outside the typical demographic, I get a bit cynical and think it’s nothing more than just lip service; especially when one higher-up at one of
the Big Two makes statements like “kids never read comics”.
Artist should take a cue from Will Eisner. His female characters were never outrageously proportioned but still sexy as hell.
Artists should take a cue from Will Eisner. His female characters were never outrageously proportioned but still sexy as hell.
Yes they were! Man could Will draw a dame!
The Starfire thing isn’t a clear cut example. While I don’t like the book, the Kory in Red Hood and the Outlaws isn’t that different from the one in The New Teen Titans. She’s a character without any human hang ups about sexuality. She likes sex and doesn’t hide it. The big difference is in the old days, she had an emotional connection to Dic…er, Nightwing and tried to conform to his sexual standards. Now, she lives her life the way she sees fit. In the abstract, she’s a healthier character now. The Starfire in Teen Titans Go! was a lovely and popular character, but she was not the one from the main DCU. While it would have been interesting to put that version in a book with Jason and Roy, it wouldn’t have made the book sell any better. Most of this legion of young, female fans that people say Kory has, never picked up the Teen Titans Go! comic book; why would they buy Red Hood and the Outlaws?
Interesting that in your BOTH of your “follow these steps” examples, the woman is the passive one. Even in your example for women.
And even after your “kidding aside” dismissal you refer to Gwen Stacy as “a piece of ass.”
Satire Sean, satire. However, you make a valid point perhaps I should have been clearer with the parody.
I figured it was. Hence noting your “kidding” comment.
But, yeah, your intending it all as a parody does not come thru.
If you’re going to write about sexism in your column (and, really, rock on!), I’m writing about racism in mine.
WHAT? HOW DARE A JEWISH WHITE WOMAN WRITE ABOUT RACISM!!! I mean what do YOU know…shit…never mind.
Doug Abramson: She’s a character without any human hang ups about sexuality. She likes sex and doesn’t hide it. … Now, she lives her life the way she sees fit. In the abstract, she’s a healthier character now.
Healthier? She’s depicted as a plaything that the guys get to high five over.
From what I’ve seen, she is portrayed as a willing and equal participant when it comes to having sex; and she’s fine with having multiple partners. Roy and Jason acting like adolescents over the situation shows that their characterizations are developmentally stunted, when it comes to sexuality, not Kory’s. Personally, I find the “frat boy jock” attitudes in the book more disturbing than turning up the volume on the portrayal of Starfire’s sexuality.
Turning up the volume on Starfire’s sexuality isn’t to develop her as a character or show her as a strong woman. It’s to present her as a sexy pinup that exists solely to fulfill male fantasies. It’s to appeal to the adolescent in the male readers. It’s to validate folks acting like Roy and Jason and tell them that’s OK.
So she likes sex. Big deal. It’s what you do with the character and, thus far, not much has been done. And while her appearance has always been in keeping with the exaggerated style used in comics for male and female heroes since, well, at least the 80s, it seems to have taken another step towards Hustler in this current incarnation.
Who doesn’t like sex? Oh yeah, the GOP.
Au contraire. They like sex, just not you having it.
Good point.
They should WANT MOTU to have sex and be happy that he does. Nobody should want someone with his own death ray getting cranky.
Doug,
I think someone already hit the GOP with a Death Ray that was set on stupid.
What are you talking about, Michael? Republican women have it sewn up!
I suspect the large breasted women has more to do with the wants/desires of the artist than the wants and desires of the 15 year old target audience . . .
Damon,
I’m with you on that 100%
My wife has looked at some comics (she isn’t really interested, and had never really looked at any before we met) and says that the average young male would be embarrassed to admit he’d never seen an actual nekkid gurl.
But comic artists seem to like to brag that they haven’t.
Mike, check out how a lot of artists — and I mean a lot — simply get various bits of female anatomy wrong. Ankles and feet, necks and backs. This isn’t for sexual exaggeration — this is either lack of observation, or lack of somebody to observe.
Now, now, Mike. Ankles necks aren’t the important parts. Why should artists spend any time developing their craft working on those? As long as they get the tits and ass right, right?
To be fair tare are a great many artist who don’t play the T & A game. Most likely because they have some T&A at home to play with. NO-I’m NOT saying that women are playthings but I do like playing with them…a lot.
Michael! Better quit while you can.
…and scene.