ComicMix Six: Why Marvel’s ‘Secret Wars’ Was Better Than ‘Civil War’
[EDITOR’S NOTE: In last week’s edition of ComicMix Six, we told you why the Skrulls’ "Secret Invasion" probably isn’t worth losing sleep over, given our list of the worst moments in Skrull invasion history. This week, we’re playing in the sandbox of big events yet again, with a list of reasons why Marvel’s recent Civil War event doesn’t stack up against one of its popular predecessors, the 1984 series Marvel Super Heroes Secret Wars. -RM]
Just over a year ago, Marvel shook up their universe with Civil War, a series-spanning event wherein the U.S. government decided, after a tragic accident involving super-powered heroes and villains, that anyone with superhuman powers would be required to register and become official federal operatives. Costumed crime-fighters picked sides, Marvel picked a slogan ("Whose Side Are You On?"), Spider-Man unmasked, and Iron Man’s pro-registration camp hunted down the anti-registration crowd led by Captain America. In the end, Cap tearfully surrendered, only to be "killed" for his troubles a few issues later.
Throughout the series’ seven issue (and countless tie-ins), the Merry Marvel Marketing team hailed Civil War as the most mind-blowing storyline since, well… ever.
Here at ComicMix, we’re not quite sure we agree. After re-reading Civil War and comparing it to one of the first epic Marvel crossover events, the ’80s action-fest Marvel Super Heroes Secret Wars, there’s a good argument to be made for the superiority of the earlier project.
Oh, and remember, what’s being discussed here is the 12-issue Secret Wars series, published by Marvel in 1984 (and featuring the first appearance of Spider-Man’s famous black costume), not to be confused with Secret War, the 2004-2005 five-issue series written by Brian Bendis.
Got it? Good. Now let’s begin…
6. REMEMBERING THE LESSONS ‘SESAME STREET’ TAUGHT THEM: In Civil War, heroes who fought alongside each other for years decide that the best way to debate the merits of a new law is to spy on one another and brawl at each and every opportunity. In Secret Wars, heroes who don’t necessarily trust each other decide that, despite their differences, teamwork and cooperation will improve their situation.
Sure, Spider-Man had a skirmish with the X-Men and the Hulk was shouting at everyone, but they still came together in the end. Wolverine and Captain America shared a heart-to-heart, and the heroes even accepted Magneto’s help, knowing that the greater good was more important than issues of mistrust.
5. FEMALES, FRONT AND CENTER: In Civil War, female characters like Storm were content to let Black Panther and other male superheroes get their hands dirty and have the spotlight.
In Secret Wars, Storm demands to be recognized as leader of the X-Men even though Cyclops and Professor Xavier are both around with their own opinions. Rather than back off from an opponent in order to let a man handle it for her, she chooses to tell off Prof. X for undermining her authority and then charges into battle, showing everyone why she’s a force to be reckoned with.
4. THE TALE OF THE TRASH-TALK TAPE: In Civil War, a silent, somber cyborg-clone of Thor goes around killing heroes until he’s eventually stopped by Hercules. (Imagine the villainous machine from Terminator without all of the snappy dialogue.)
In Secret Wars, the real Thor takes down several supervillains at once while proclaiming, "Thy touch OFFENDS me!"
It takes a real man’s man to shout a line like that during a life-and-death battle and not come out looking like a bit of a priss.
3. FEELING HOT, HOT, HOT: In Civil War, the Human Torch’s biggest moments involved being beaten into a coma by civilians and dying his hair.
In Secret Wars, the Human Torch showed up the Avengers by defeating the mass-murdering robot Ultron all by his lonesome and hooking up with an alien girl who didn’t mind that they didn’t speak the same language. Boo-yah!
2. MAKING THE BEST OF A BAD SITUATION: In Civil War, no one smiles… ever. This is because, apparently, readers need to be shown that the situation is that intense. It’s like an episode of 24, and everyone is Jack Bauer.
In Secret Wars, despite the fact that they are facing possible death on a planet far away from home at the hands of a god-like being, Thing and Hawkeye remember the value of taking time to laugh. At one point in the series, they convince the villains Klaw and Lizard that, instead of fighting, it would be so much better to settle their differences over a game of patty-cake.
1. STAND TALL, SUPER-SOLDIER!: In Secret Wars, even after his shield gets broken and the heroes are at their lowest, Captain America doesn’t cry.
Instead, he simply decides to kick more ass!
Alan Kistler has also beaten Ultron (albeit in ultimate frisbee). He has been recognized by Warner Bros. Pictures as a comic book historian and can be seen in the special features sections of the Adventures of Aquaman and Justice League: New Frontier DVDs. He really wishes Marvel, DC or the kind folks at Doctor Who would realize he has some fun story ideas to share with them. His personal website can be found at: www.KistlerUniverse.com.
You can find new editions of ComicMix Six every week here at ComicMix. Have a suggestion for a list you’d like to see us take on? Want to let us know why we’re wrong? Post your comments at the end of this article!
As of January 2008, GIT Corp lost the right to produce DVD collections of Marvel Comics. One of the last collections they made was "Marvel Comics Civil War" collecting 199 issues that tie in with the event! This is technically out of print now, but there are three sellers selling them on Amazon.com.If you need to read it, this is an inexpensive way to do it!http://www.amazon.com/Marvel-Comics-Complete-Coll…
Actrually, the proper thing to discuss here is "Why would i give a toss about either one?"
Hmmm…I smell another CM6 topic: "Six Reasons Why Mike Weber Should Give a Toss About Secret Wars and/or Civil War"I'll add it to the list!
7. No "Civil War" action figures.
Now, you know "ComicMix Seven" just doesn't have the same ring to it, Glenn… Work with me here!
Perhaps the memories of Secret Wars I have improved over time — I'm reminded that originally "nostalgia" was the name given to a disease, and perhaps it reads better as a trade paperback than it did in serialized monthly pamphlet form. But I know one thing: I wasn't alone in my belief that it sucked.After the end of SWI, Marvel had one of their retailer sales meetings at which their direct sales manager, Carol Kalish (a wonderful and brilliant human being), made several announcements of upcoming events. She ended with the announcement of Secret Wars II — at which point she was loudly booed."Hey, what are you guys booing about? Secret Wars sold swell!" Carol said (and I grossly paraphrase; I can't recall her ever saying "swell.")."Because it sucked" the retailers replied, loudly and vociferously. "But you sold them big-time," Carol more-or-less said."Yeah, but it really sucked.""But you sold out of them!"This went on for a long time, and Marvel released Secret Wars II anyway, and it sold like a son of a bitch. There was a lesson that was learned from all this, and it was learned by ALL U.S. comics publishers at the time.If the event is big enough, quality doesn't matter. As long as it seems like a collectible, the ever-decreasing circle of pamphlet fans will buy it. Again and again and again.
And as long as comics companies return again and again and again to turning out drek, there will only be an ever-decreasing circle of pamphlet fans. You might be able to sell a bunch of copies in the short term, but I'm convinced that the only way to expand your audience over time is with consistently high quality and ORIGINAL products.