Sat Feb 16, 2008 6:46AM10 comments ›
Sat Feb 16, 2008 — by Martha Thomases
The 'In' Crowd, by Martha Thomases
Brilliant Disguise #44
It would be nice if, now that I’m in my mid-50s, I could stop worrying about whether or not I’m popular. Sensible people get over this in junior high, average people stop in high school, and only a few truly insecure carry it through to college. Grown-ups, who have jobs and responsibilities and hobbies, rarely let such thoughts cross their minds.And then there’s me.
One of the most exciting things about this political year is the way outsiders have been welcomed, especially by Democrats. The leading contenders for the nomination are a black man and a woman, both of whom are decidedly wonky in their approach to politics. A Latino man ran a great campaign, and is assumed to be on the short list of possible vice-presidential candidates.
This is exciting, and for reasons far beyond the political (although, if this trend means the war will be over and people can stop getting blown up so frequently, and maybe in this country we can have health insurance, that would be great).
Mostly, I can spend ignore these insecurities that have lingered for decades. When I can’t, I try to use my experience for good. By relating to outsiders, I find common cause with racial, ethnic and other minorities who are not always invited to society’s metaphorical proms.
Even as a pre-teen, I knew this was a problem. I knew that, as a Jew, my people had spent millennia being excluded from polite society, as well as most professions and the right to own land. There was a time when I refused to join a Jewish sorority (why they had sororities for kids in middle school, I have no idea) because I said it was ridiculous for Jews to form societies just for the purpose of excluding other Jews. Thus, I revealed my ignorance of Jewish history, and centuries of jockeying for position among Jews from Germany, Russia and Spain.
I moved to New York at the height of the punk movement, and headed to CBGBs like it was Mecca. I met a lot of people who were truly cool, and always felt a little bit too straight and a little bit too fat to feel like one of the cool kids (which, since it was punk, meant I fit in perfectly).
And, at the same time, the direct market was taking off, and there were the first comic book specialty stores. One of my proudest possessions was a card from Forbidden Planet, which meant I was a professional and entitled to a discount. Keith Richards had one! Unfortunately, my wallet was stolen, and I never got it replaced.
Forbidden Planet was cool, but it wasn’t the closest store. There was a hole-in-the-wall close by, a small space with a few racks and lots of long boxes. I’d go there for my weekly fix. I thought, hey, I’m an adult woman. I write for the Village Voice. I write for the National Lampoon. I write for Spy. I don’t have to prove anything to these guys.
They thought differently. As I brought my stack of mostly DC Comics to the front, to pay for them, the clerk behind the counter would often scoff at my purchases. It didn’t matter that I bought other things – by reading Superman, I proved myself to be a troglodyte with no taste. To him, I wasn’t one of the cool kids.
My son has a group of friends who go to Jim Hanley’s Universe in Manhattan every Wednesday. They call themselves The Nerd Avengers. They buy comics, then go somewhere to drink and discuss.
It’s a funny idea, and I might find it fun. However, my son says he doesn’t like to go because they decry his taste in comics. They say he doesn’t know what’s good. Now, being my son, he’s been reading comics since he was 18 months old. He would read passages from The World Encyclopedia of Comicslike an Orthodox Jew reading his daily Torah portion. He knew Julie Schwartz and Archie Goodwin and Lou Stathis. Kyle Baker, Denny O’Neil and Howard Cruse came to his Bar Mitzvah, and Frank Miller sent a gift. He slept in Neil Gaiman’s basement. We don’t have the same taste – that would be creepy – but he knows his stuff.
I’m indignant on his behalf, but he doesn’t care. He must get that from his father’s side of the family.
Martha Thomases, ComicMix Media Goddess, is looking forward to her 40th High School Reunion in 2011.
Jump to comments (10) 
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Comments (10)
Elayne Riggs (7:52 AM on Sat Feb 16, 2008)
Very enjoyable column, Martha! I too am often baffled as to why one of the first things often done by groups that are so excluded by the general society is the exclusion of others. It's like they can't wait to get back at someone for someone ELSE wronging them.
MARK WHEATLEY (8:37 AM on Sat Feb 16, 2008)
But Martha - you have turned your weakness into your Super Power! You have become one of the worlds finest at getting others to accept an outside idea by making it an inside idea.
In all the years I've been working with artists and writers at Insight Studios I've come to notice something important. I think I picked up on this because there have been so many creative people I've known before they developed into the artist or writer or whatever that they were headed for. But it usually works like this - The guy who is obsessed with how completely worthless he is at being able to draw is often the guy who all the other artists envy for his ability to draw. And this works this way because since he was obsessed with his weakness at drawing, that's where he focused all his thought, energy and creativity and study for years and years.
I think we miss seeing that in a lot of people because we meet them already knowing their work and reputations. Who would ever think that that award winning artist was still obsessing over how to draw an elbow at a certain angle? But that is exactly what makes an award winning artist.
And your Super Power has turned you into a Media Goddess. How much more do you want?
Martha Thomases (8:49 AM on Sat Feb 16, 2008)
I have this theory that New York City is made up of people who weren't popular in high school, so they came to the city to reinvent themselves. Except now NYC is too expensive for that to happen as much as it used to.
MARK WHEATLEY (10:04 AM on Sat Feb 16, 2008)
Ah yes - I remember you saying that before. And I still think it is a pretty good theory. These days people don't need to move to NYC for that. They have the Internet.
Mike Gold (8:40 AM on Sat Feb 16, 2008)
"The guy who is obsessed with how completely worthless he is at being able to draw is often the guy who all the other artists envy for his ability to draw."
You never worked with Alex Toth, I take it?
MARK WHEATLEY (10:02 AM on Sat Feb 16, 2008)
Sadly - I did not really know Alex Toth. I had an exchange with him when we were putting together the Gray Morrow VISIONARY book (and you can still order a copy through Diamond Comics at your local comic retailer), because Alex was a fan of Gray's work. But I did not get to know Alex and aside from the public stories I don't really know if you are saying he was egocentric or if he was a perfect example of my theory.
Mike Gold (10:09 AM on Sat Feb 16, 2008)
Alex was known to be a bit egocentric. He was hard to work with, particularly on color notes. But he was one of the most amazingly fantastic artists around; I worship his work. Still the definitive Black Canary artist in my book.
John Tebbel (9:08 AM on Sat Feb 16, 2008)
As Husband Boy, I must exculpate my family on the charge of congenital indifference. According to them it was something I picked up on the street.
On the other hand, at an early age I was serenely content to be one of two JFK supporters in my Fourth Grade class (shout out to Greg Smith, wherever you are). In spite of the rumors that he'd put "In Pope, We Hope" on the coinage. (In Toth, Wax Wroth)
Valerie D'Orazio (3:06 PM on Sat Feb 16, 2008)
Your column brought back memories for me of going to the East Village for the first time when I was 12 years old, and just feeling like the world cracked open with new possibilities in art.
Swayze (4:54 PM on Sun Feb 24, 2008)
Well, I, for one, always thought you were cool, and one of the main reasons was that you WEREN'T like the rest of us blonde bubbleheads - You were incredibly knowledgeable, engaged, and something of a hippie chick, which I always aspired to but couldn't pull off if I had slept with Jerry Garcia!
Let's hope we manage to get together before the 40th,
Much love,
C.