Articles by marc-alan-fishman
Wed Aug 5, 2009 — by Marc Alan Fishman
ComicMix Six: Every Panel You've Ever Visited At A Convention!
With the Chicago Comic-Con and WorldCon both around the bend, you may be tempted to waste your days away at the panels off the main floor. But I say, gentle geeks... NAY! Why waste your precious con time in stuffy rooms with stale ice water and tons of other mouth-breeders, when you can peruse the artist alley (where local, hip and trendy comic creators like to be... ahem...), grab schwag at the big booths (or not if YOUR local con has no big booths this year... epic fail...) or spend all of your inheritance on the dealer floor!
But Marc, you plead, I'm tired! I want to make my voice heard! I need to learn hot new tips and skills on how to make my portfolio Marvel worthy! Well, I said it once, and yes... I say it again: NAY. Why, you ask? Because ALL panels at comic conventions break down into one of these top 6 over-done panels:
1. “Mondo-Nation-Neighborhood-Universal-Pow-Wow”
Yup, this is the stalwart gotta-go-to panel they hype and hype and hype. Hey! Do you want HOT, never-seen-before, uber-rare, special sneak previews of all the things to come?! Well cart your XXL self on down to Hall H for a sensational panel that's sure to knock your sock and sandals combo clear off! Drooling yet? Well, sop it up, fanboy. Thanks to the interwebs, all you're gonna get is a rehash of the solicits you read about months ago on ComicMix, IGN, Newsarama, Comic Book Resources, CSN, or a hundred other places. And those special sneak peaks you're just vibrating to see? Yup... posted on the artist's message boards about the same time you were reading those months-old solicits! And you were counting on some tantalizing rumors about all your favorite characters? Well Bucko, are you in for a treat! Turns out the big boys can't tell you anything you can't (and most likely DID) read in Wizard itself, last month. Sounds fun? Sounds to me like 2 hours of time you could have spent waiting in line to get that Red Hulk Sketch Holofoil Variant Cover 17B signed, kiddo.
Continue reading ComicMix Six: Every Panel You've Ever Visited At A Convention! ›
Tue Aug 4, 2009 — by Marc Alan Fishman
An Unshaven Rant: Should I worry about the 2009 Chicago Comic-Con?
Hello ComicMix dwellers (and loyal FOMAFers...). I come to you today a bit... deflated. Why you ask? Because I just took a sneaky-peak over at the Chicago Comicon's exhibitor list and program schedule. Long story (...forthcoming...) short? It's not looking great on paper. This angers and frustrates me to no end, but I digress. The more I get angry at this, the brighter the silver lining comes creeping in. Confused? Now, I ask unto you my loyal readers, all seven of you, to take this brief journey with me on the anger-train. After we reach the end of the journey, you'll see why our last stop is in Happyville.
The Backstory
The Chicago Comicon (as long as I've known it, mind you) was built on the 'Wizard World' platform. (Yes, I know it predates Wizard, but that's not how I experienced it.) Growing up on comics in the 90's meant Wizard was my one-stop shop for all the hip and trendy news about comic books... whilst the “internets” was still in it's primordial-ooze phase. My first con, sadly, was right prior to my senior year in high school. Even back then (and if you ask Glenn, or Mike, or Russ, or really, a lot of people patrolling this site) it wasn't that long ago, this con was pretty darned cool. I'm a mid-westerner mind you, so trekking to SDCC is NOT in any Chicago-kid's budget. But it never mattered. SDCC was always at the beginning of the summer, and Chicago's was at the end. There was enough time for people to calm down, and as Dan DiDio says (said) every year... “Chicago's con is always about the books. Always about the fans.”
Marvel, DC, Dark Horse, and Image all put up HUGE booths where fans could grab free schwag like buttons, posters, and bookmarks. Samples and previews of forthcoming issues adorned tables behind which our favorite creators were signing piles of their own penned materials. Beside these mammoth booths sat smaller publishers, just as happy to show off their wares. And of course beyond that lay the monstrous sea of dealers, and beyond that still, the indie and mainstream friendly confines of Artist Alley. When time came that one could be sick of this massive room of geekocity, there sat a bevvy of panels where the pros came to sit and talk to their fans nearly face to face on a multitude of topics. Some came for the sneak peaks of the years books to come, some (like me) came for the free hints and tricks to learn in the schooling panels, and some came for screenings of geek-laden cinema. All in all, it was wrapping up Christmas Channukkah, my birthday, and your birthday all in one long weekend.
And every year since, for the next 7 years, I went as a fan. Last year I went for the first time as a “semi-professional (having published a graphic novelette in 2008. Over the course of these last 8 years now, looking onto my 9th, I've begun to see my “Rome” begin to crumble.
Continue reading An Unshaven Rant: Should I worry about the 2009 Chicago Comic-Con? ›
Fri Jul 31, 2009 — by Marc Alan Fishman
Unshaven Comics presents Famous Facial Hair in Fiction Fundraising for Chicago Comicon
Stickers will be on sale at the Chicago Comicon, with proceeds going to Comix4Sight
At the upcoming Chicago Comicon, me and my 'Unshaven Cohorts' will be (amongst other things) raising money for the Comix4Sight charity and auction at our table in artist's alley. Simply drop by, and you can be a proud owner of our freshly minted "Famous Facial Hair in Fiction" Stickers! We're featuring:
- The Marvel Heroes: Wolverine, Tony Stark (Vintage Pre-Movie Moustache style), and Thor (Kick-Assed Bearded style)
- The DC Villains: Deathstroke The Terminator, Sinestro, and Ra's A Ghul
- General Pop-Culture Icons of Kiss-Assery: Shaft (Shut Yo' Mouth.), Walker Texas Ranger, and Magnum P.I.
The stickers will be on sale for 2 bucks a piece, or get the whole set for 5 bucks! ALL proceeds go to Comix4Sight.
And hey, if you've got more money to spend, we are still selling copies of The March: Crossing Bridges in America, as well as a collector's preview of "Disposable Razors: Volume 1". Shameless plug over. Come out, and help support this awesome charity, and take home a few stickers to make people jealous with.
Sat Jul 25, 2009 — by Marc Alan Fishman
#SDCC: Mattel unleashes next wave of DC Plasticy Doom (Patrol)!
Folks walking the tiny (ahem) floor at the San-Diego Comic Con this weekend got a sneak peak at the 197 10th and 11th wave of Mattel's DC Universe Classics line! While wave 10 continues to add another New God to it's ranks, Wave 11 starts a whole new year of figures you'll be stomping over kids in Wal-Mart for... That's right, wave 11 introduces the Green Lantern Corps (and probably the multi-hued combatants forthcoming as well...)!
Thanks to actionfigurepics.com for the tasty info and pic-age!
Behind the glass this year fans got a glimpse of:
WAVE 10
• Joker, with Cane, Laughing Fish, Playing Cards, and Giganto-Mallet!
• Batman, 90's Michael Keaton-Style... with... giant... folding Bat-Computer thing?
• Power Girl, with Giant Bust, and Thighs with Walnut-Crushing-Power!
• Forager- with Shield and Wrist Blaster
• Beast Boy, Doom Patrol Style, with "I Transform into this!" Bird!
• Robotman, Doom Patrol Style, with "Important Device on My Chest" Accessory
• Man-Bat, with "I hope someone cares" Action!
• The Build-A-Figure appears to be none other than the Jack Kirby-esque "IMPERIEX"!
WAVE 11
• Steppenwolf, In his Green and Red costumes (gotta love the variants!), packed with various swords and axes of villainy!
• The Question, Vic Sage Style... while the figure doesn't show if the mask comes off, it too fails to capture the perfect Salmon colored shirt of the hit 80's book.
• Cyborg Superman, Sinestro Corps Style, albeit with no shown battery.
• Deadman, with "Collar to Put Nightwing to Shame!" Action.
• John Stewart, with Green Constructs of a fist and large gun!
• Katma Tui, with Green Constructs of a beam sword, and shield!
• Shark!, With.... I'm sorry. Look at the picture of this.... this is a waste of plastic.
• The Build-A-Figure appears to be the Mighty Poozer Smackin' Kilowog!
FABULOUS TWO-PACKS!
• "Animal Instinct!" - Includes Grant Morrison's favvy tiny leather jacket clad Animal Man and everyone's favorite 'WTF' character... B'wana Beast!
• "Sinestro Corps!" - Includes the dentist's favorite lady in yellow, Karu-Sil (with trusty yellow construct of her playful pups) and the bizzaro-esque Romat Ru!
SUPER DUPER GIFT PACK!
• Save up your birthday money for the "Gotham City Five- Gift Pack" which includes Two-Face, Super-Friends Costumed "Exclusive" Lex Luthor, Batman and Superman, and Catwoman!
Fri Jul 24, 2009 — by Marc Alan Fishman
#SDCC: Is McLovin ready to 'Kick-Ass'?
Who kicks more ass? McLovin', or the Red Mist?
"There's a reason why [Nicolas] Cage ain't here..." So said Christopher Mintz-Plasse, co-star of Mark Millar's comic-to-screen adaptation of Kick-Ass, brought to us at the San Diego Comic-Con in that room of rooms... Hall D! Director Matthew Vaughn presented alongside special guest Mark Millar, the aforementioned Mr. Mintz-Plasse (formerly McLovin' of Superbad Fame...), as well as John Romita Jr., the comic book artist who brings Kick-Ass to life every month(ish) via Marvel's ICON line.
Showing off Avid-fresh clips to a rabid audience, Vaughn was ensuring a final product that would bring a genuine adaptation that followed the comic to the letter, or in this case... the panels. "We are a genuine comic book adaptation with comic book authors involved in the production of the movie... It's really important to me that fans of the comic like the film. I'll be more upset if fans of the comic hate the movie than anybody else." Vaughn told MTV's Splash Page blog prior to the screening.
And what a screening it was. Scenes including Nicholas Cage's Big Daddy shooting his little girl, Chloe Moretz, begarbed in a bulletproof vest. A Paris Hilton joke warmed the crowd. And what of the titular hero? Aaron Johnson plays 'Dave', who in clips presented at the con, showed off the straight from panel to screen costume (no leather upgrades ala X-men here.), as well as comic-worthy violence. Tasers to a thug's forehead? Check. Hit-Girl slicing and dicing bad guys enough to shame Beatrix Kiddo? Check. And McLovin' as the hot-rodding Red Mist? Double check. The fans in attendance ate it up? How much? They demanded a reshowing of the trailer, and they got it.
But this begs to be asked... obviously Vaughn knew what to say and show the rabid comic fans in attendance, but Millar isn't squeaky clean when it comes to his adaptations on film... lest we forget the curved bullets of amazing aptitude in Wanted: Not Quite the Comic circa 2008.
Look for 'Kick-Ass' at the tail end (sorry) of this year.
Fri Jul 24, 2009 — by Marc Alan Fishman
#SDCC: James Cameron presents 'Avatar'
How do you follow 'Titanic'? Here's how...
In the grand hall denoted only as "H", swarms of Comic-Con goers were given a treat of global proportions. 24 minutes of James Cameron's upcoming Avatar was screened for those on hand. Of course all recording devices were banned from use, but that didn't keep bloggers away from their terminals as soon as the panel was finished. Here's the low down of what we know was shown:
Jake Sully (being played by Sam Worthington) is shown entering a military briefing, confined to a wheelchair. We're reassured by a gruff officer that it's his job to keep them all alive... but (dun-dun-dunnnnnn) he assures the soliders in the room, including Jake, that he won't be successful.
From here, we move quickly to a lab where we meet Jake's 'Avatar', an artificial/alien body that will be piloted by Jake after his DNA is combined (via the Avatar program, natch) with the Na'vi alien race. We meet Dr. Grace Augustine (played by sci-fi fan favorite, Sigourney Weaver), who helps load Jake into the Avatar machine, after a bit of playful banter.
Cue the special effects. We enter Oz, err, Pandora.
Tue Jul 14, 2009 — by Marc Alan Fishman
Webcomics You Should Be Reading: 'Cyanide and Happiness'
Yup. I'm sick. Twisted. Perverse. Warped. Dare I even say (dare... dare....) a little insane in the membrane. Why you ask? Simply put... someone sent me a link to this crudely drawn little webcomic, and after a single strip, I knew I must share this with the six or seven of you who haven't heard of it. What lay ahead in this article will make some of you angry. Others will throw their hands up in disgust and curse loudly at the screen. But there will be those who see this as a new beacon of hope. Yes my friends, I bring to you something so wrong it must be right. A webcomic that appears to challenge xkcd in artistic merit, and tickle the nethers of the Parking Lot is Full for content. Look quickly beneath this velvet drape and behold the evil hilariousnesstitude of... Cyanide and Happiness!
The strip starting humbly by a young Kris Wilson, who was then suffering from strep throat (seriously folks, if Wikipedia didn't exist, I might not know anything.). Kris caught the eye of web hosts Matt Melvin, Rob DenBleyker and Dave McElfatrick. Soon thereafter, the strip was given a home on what is now Explosm.net. While Wilson was the originator of the comic, over time, Matt, Rob, and Dave joined the fray, helping to add strips since it's inception in 2005. But seriously, enough with the “information”... I know those who didn't heed my warning above want to know why I'm giggling like priest in an elementary school over this ugly ugly strip.
Cyanide and Happiness by definition is described as “dark, cynical, often offensive, and exceedingly irreverent. Frequent topics of humor include disabilities, rape, cancer, murder, suicide, necrophilia, pedophilia, sexual deviancy, sexually transmitted diseases, self-mutilation, nihilism, and violence. The comic does not always have a definite punchline in each strip, or may have several panels of "awkward silence" after (or instead of) the punchline, with characters simply staring at each other.” (again, kudos to those wikipedia writers... where do they get the time?!). If that description doesn't make you foam at the mouth for examples, well, you're probably more normal than I am.
As one cycles through Cyanide and Happiness, it's obvious there's a good sense of timing, and a deliberate storytelling ability, despite the art being all but non-existent. Yes, it's essentially stick figure humor, much like the aforementioned xkcd, but for all of dumb people who find strips like these far funnier than these. And yes, I know I've already waxed poetic on xkcd, and now you loyal FOMAFers (again, if you DON'T know, well, look it up.) are getting your panties in a bunch. Did Marc just go back on his word? Is he saying Cyanide and Happiness is somehow superior to xkcd? Is he trying to start a flame war? Yes. I am. I want all of you to get riled up and start a crazy posting war. Tell your friends... get them involved. Tweet about it on your dingleberries, and update your mybooks with your facespace messages. I want to see vile comments lambasting my parents for even giving birth to me, which leads (eventually) to you having to read this article, and now you're so angry you just have to.... AAAAHHHH!!!
Continue reading Webcomics You Should Be Reading: 'Cyanide and Happiness' ›
Wed Jun 24, 2009 — by Marc Alan Fishman
Transformer Title Fights: Tag Team Main Event!
Transformers... more than meets the eye. This, we know. But what happens when the mighty all-spark malfunctions and sends the Michael Bay Monstrosities to wage war against the Autobots and Decepticons of our shared youth? Only you, the cosmically-conscious Comic Mix commenters can conclude! Now cast your votes!
The Main Event: Team Optimus versus Team Megatron!
So, for the past week or so, you fine folks out there have debated and argued in admiration for your favorite G1 Transformers or for the Michael Bay Monsters. But when it came down to this author simply could not make the leader of the Autobots fight himself. And Megatron? Puh-leaze... if given the chance, he'd team up with himself for the opportunity to decimate his red rival. So, without further adieu... let's let the energon fly!
In the Blue and Red Corner, we have our fearless leaders! They are the semi's of superiority! They are the bots with the brains and the brawn! They are the holders of the Matrix! It's Team Optimus Prime! The Generation 1 Blocky Bot comes packed to the gills with firepower. From his trusty sidearm, to his tractor-trailer packed with a powerful turret, Optimus Prime of the G1 Autobots is ready to rumble! Tag teaming with his movie counterpoint, comes his partner, the beefy Semi-cab with a fancy flaming paint job! The movie Optimus is very similar to his G1 counterpart. While he lacks G1's fancy Energon axe, he does come with an articulated mouth. So, he's got that going for him, right?
On the other side of the ring comes a team of pure malevolence. G1 Megatron was always a dastardly foe, who turned into a potent hand gun. Sure, his handgun form was miniscule in comparison to his normal robot size, but then again, G1 Transformers had no problem changing size at will. Packed with his own arm cannon as well an energon mace... the Silver Centurion of Sinister Spite is certain to cause his fair share of slaughter. And who better to wield him in gun mode then... himself! The movie Megatron this time around is a bombastic tank, after he frees himself from the briney deep he was left in, thanks to plucky Sam Witwicky.
It's the battle you've been waiting for. So folks... who takes the crown? Optimus Squared may have the soul, but Mega-Megatron is gonna be pretty pissed. It's a big battlefield out there. I expect the ensuring war to destroy plenty of buildings... but not come near Megan Fox and her pouty lips. Please vote below for your favorite team, and remember...
The future is built on dreams. Hang on to them. And then make sure you voted for your favorite Witwicky, Devastator, Bumblebee, and Soundwave!
Tue Jun 23, 2009 — by Marc Alan Fishman
Transformer Title Fights: the War of the Witwicky!
Transformers... more than meets the eye. This, we know. But what happens when the mighty all-spark malfunctions and sends the Michael Bay Monstrosities to wage war against the Autobots and Decepticons of our shared youth? We've got a few battles in our back pocket ComicMixers... let's let 'em duke it out, shall we?
Round Four: The BFF Brawl for it all!
Without the backdrop of Earth, would the battle between the Autobots and Decepticons be awesome? Yes. But because it is on our little blue orb in the cosmos, it's that much cooler. Even cooler than that though, the heroic Autobots befriended one of our very own. Spike Witwicky was a plucky 14 year old hard hat wearing son of oil rig worker Sparkplug. When Sparky's rig became a set piece for the war between those who were “more than meets the eye” Spike and his dad offered their friendship to the Autobots... to help them acclimate to our hip and trendy world. Optimus and his crew accepted, and soon, Spike was in our living room, capturing our heart. Sure Spike made some mistakes... he unwittingly brought Soundwave into Autobot headquarters. He later got captured and brainwashed... but hey, he was just a kid. To counter point it, he introduced the good guys to the concept of Dinosaurs, as well as provide companionship on the many adventures to Cybertron, Dinobot Island, etc. It was this companionship that most could argue that made Optimus the human-loving leader he is today. And without him, who would Bumblebee quip to? No one, that's who.
In the movies, Sam Witwicky is this generation's “Marty McFly” (according to TF 1 writer Roberto Orci). Sporting a crude 'tude in the first movie, Sam was our POV man, quick with the wits, and quicker with the “run for your life” skill. This skill of course allows Sam, who is a marginally unathletic kid, the superhuman ability to outrun battle-trained transformers in an unending loop of flying debris and explosions. While he doesn't sport a curly red mop and hardhat, he does sport todays hip equivalent: two tee-shirts on at once, cargo pants, and a bit of the life-giving all spark. Hell of a keychain kid.
So folks, let's say a rift in celluloid occurs, and these Wikwickys are made to do battle. Sam has the age advantage, but Spike is wearing a hardhat. Sam has the all-spark... but, to make things fair, Spike has his brain placed into that cool Autobot X. That out to make it nice and even right? Only one way to find out... COMMENT!
... And don't forget to vote in the previous rounds, for the Amalgamated-Assemblage of alloy...Devastator! Or for the Buzz-worthy Bumblebee! Or your favorite Vocoder-voiced-villain, Soundwave!
Fri Jun 19, 2009 — by Marc Alan Fishman
Transformer Title Fight: Devastator!
Transformers... more than meets the eye. This, we know. But what happens when the mighty all-spark malfunctions and sends the Michael Bay Monstrosities to wage war against the Autobots and Decepticons of our shared youth? We've got a few battles in our back pocket ComicMixers... let's let 'em duke it out, shall we?
Round Three: Green and Purple Devastation Vs. The Rainbow Bright Beast
Face it... if it's a robot, or even robot-like, and from Japan? It can combine with any other robot-like device, if it wills it. Case in point? The mighty Decepticon combiner Devastator! In the cartoon and comics, 6 construction vehicles (after a long day building stuff and whistling at a passing Arcee) formed a mighty bot of devastation. The only issue? Despite being of normal bot intellect in their own robot-modes... the combining somehow stupified Devastator into a veritable Green Hulk. But why? Because my fellow fans... the early combiner technology didn't have the capability of decision making! All six parts of Devastator had to agree on an action before doing it. So, even with robo-brains... the cartoon version of this mighty bot could beat you up at recess, but would probably need to cheat off of you during class.
Little is known thus far about the Bay-birthed-behemoth. But what we do know is this: the new Devastator is a veritable giant, standing ten stories tall! Coincidently this robotic hulk also wears purple around his midsection. Interesting, no? In explosions-over-exposition land (the Bay of Robots if you will)... Devastator is made (we question this, but wikipedia is helping today...) of 6-10 possible construction bots, all found in the Egyptian desert. When combined, this new bot forms a more “Gorilla-esque” tower of power. Who apparently has a thing for sucking up sand... and Autobots into it's giant craw. Past this, we can only assume that this combiner will be loyal to Megatron, and do a ton of damage. It will be nice to see Michael Bay actually blow stuff up. He tends to do quiet films, and this fan for one thinks he would do better to let some shrapnel fly in a cloud of fire and ash.
So folks, who wins? Will the first Generation Green Meanie pound the Sand-Sucking Sycophant into submission? Only you, the cosmically-conscious Comic Mix commenters can conclude! Now cast your votes!
... And don't forget to vote in the previous rounds, for the Buzz-worthy Bumblebee, and then for your favorite Vocoder-voiced-villain, Soundwave!
Thu Jun 18, 2009 — by Marc Alan Fishman
Transformer Title Fights: Bumblebee!
Transformers... more than meets the eye. This, we know. But what happens when the mighty all-spark malfunctions and sends the Michael Bay Monstrosities to wage war against the Autobots and Decepticons of our shared youth? We've got a few battles in our back pocket ComicMixers... let's let 'em duke it out, shall we?
Round One: Plucky Bug or Caring Camaro?
Next to Optimus, he's the fan favorite who always wants to be your buddy. Touted as the recon vehicle of the G1 series, Bumblebee took form as the lovable VW Bug. And while yes, he was the “little brother bot” to most of the other ARK crew-members... Don't shortchange his abilities in battle. Because of his smaller stature, Bumblebee uses fuel 1.8 times more effectively than his Autobot brethren. Suffice to say the gas guzzling Michael Bay Bot would not be able to boast. And with his trusty sidearm laser blaster... he's got some firepower to back his sharp tongue!
Who'd want to be a compact anyways? Some twenty years later, young Bumblebee gets a bit of an upgrade for his movie version... taking form as a new (and still impossible to get in the dealer) Chevy Camaro. But what about a quick wit? As you recall, the lad is mostly mute, as he was “damaged” during battle. Of course this time around, Bumblebee will be repaired! Voiced by ComicMix's own Amazing Mark Ryan (writer of the amazing series The Pilgrim), who will hopefully add the spunk to the character so missed in Michael Bay's first outing. The movie incarnation of the 'Bee comes to the party with a powerful “combat mode” that the G1 'Bee won't see coming. So, let's open the gates and let 'em duke it out!
So... who takes the crown in the yellow metal throw-down? Generation One's Spunky Chunky Clunker, or Shia LeBeouf's LeBaby? Only you, the cosmically-conscious Comic Mix commenters can conclude! Now cast your votes!
... And don't forget to vote in the previous round, for your favorite Vocoder-voiced-villain Soundwave!
Wed Jun 17, 2009 — by Marc Alan Fishman
Transformer Title Fights: Soundwave!
Transformers... more than meets the eye. This, we know. But what happens when the mighty all-spark malfunctions and sends the Michael Bay Monstrosities to wage war against the Autobots and Decepticons of our shared youth? We've got a few battles in our back pocket ComicMixers... let's let em duke it out, shall we?
Round One: Satellite Scoundrel or Baneful Boombox?
We know him collectively as Soundwave. Always loyal. Always awesome. As the Decepticon Comununications Officer, he's known as the vocoder-voiced master of sonics. Whether he's deploying his evil tapes-in-diguise (Ravage, Laserbeak, Ratbat, Rumble, just to name a few...) or spying on unsuspecting Autobots in his tape-deck form, he's always the evil bot in-the-know. A warrior thru and thru, Soundwave is never one to shy away from a fight. And with his shoulder mounted blaster, he's packing enough punch by himself to lay waste without need for calling in backup. But let's say he wants to bring a few friends to the party? Well then, Soundwave is the one-man band. His battalion of tape sized Decepticons can take to the skies, or shake the ground. They can hide in plain site, or join their Blue Boss for any fracas that he may take apart in.
Fans clamored that Soundwave didn't make it into Bay's movie in the first go-round. Deciding that he'd actually listen to the fans, Michael Bay made sure Soundwave would make it into Transformers: Rise of the Fallen. Given that Bay thought the “size-altering” Transformers of the cartoon was “too detached from reality” (So you can't buy that they can't alter their size Michael, but you've no problem with high school kids being able to outrun an alien overlord who fought Optimus Prime to a standstill? Just wondering.) Soundwave would be given a new form for the movie. Taking shape as a satellite, Soundwave hovers in Earth's orbit... perhaps to jam communications? Maybe he'll be influential in sending more Decepticons down to Earth to free his master Megatron? We'll have to catch the flick to find out, but in the mean time... we might as well ring the bell!
Who would win in a battle to the end? Would it be the blue-hued tape-deck of doom (with small battalion of smaller-still tapes-of-doom)? Or would it be the Bay-born Satellite of Spite? Only you, the cosmically-conscious ComicMix commenters can conclude! Now cast your votes!
Fri Jun 12, 2009 — by Marc Alan Fishman
ComicMix Six: Sucktastic Super Powers!
So, you want to be a superhero? Not a problem. Oh... you're not a billionaire orphan with years to dedicate to the martial arts? Don't fret! I'm sure you can play in a lake of toxic ooze, or get bit by a genetically unstable super-wombat, right? Well... even if you don't have powers, don't feel bad. Cause there are some folks out there in comic-book-land that would have been better off as bartenders or stock-boys than crime-fighters or super-heroes. Don't believe me? Well kind citizen, scope this list of lameoids out, and see sometimes it's no so bad being normal after all*.
Night Man – Johnny Domino was just your run-of-the-mill jazz musician with those totally hip round sunglasses (Superboy anyone?) and that always fashionable accessory... the dangely cross earring in one ear! Too cool for school you say? Well, without warning, an alien bolt of lightening hit a cable car, which in turn hit Johnny's convertible, and a piece of shrapnel wound up in his head. Talk about a crappy Monday! Well, lucky for Domino, the shrapnel caused him to gain super human abilities! These powers combined with a kevlar vest and a grappling gun allowed Domino to take to the night and don a name shared by his underpaid jelly doughnut eating brothers-in-arms! Johnny Domino is the man who need not sleep... He is the man who can sorta hear your dirty thoughts... He's the man who doesn't need night vision goggles to see in the night. Johnny Domino is Night Man!
Mr. Brownstone – That's right kiddos... Not everyone gets a superpower and decides to become a hero. Sometimes they decide to become a minor villain! Garrison Klum was born one of those despicable mutants you've heard of. When puberty hit, did Klum gain eye lasers capable of destroying mountains? No. Did he gain a flexible metallic shell allowing him to become invulnerable and superhumanly strong? Nuh-uh. Did he gain the power to teleport? Yes! But... not himself mind you. Garrison only gained the mutant ability to teleport small amounts of liquid! Now, give the guy some credit... he renamed himself after a slang term for heroin, and teleported a few ounces of the good stuff right into Spider-man's heart! Sure he ended dying from his own teleporting brother literally teleporting inside him and exploding out of him (ew.)... But give him credit. The world gave him a lemon of a power, and hey, he made lemonade.
Thu Jun 4, 2009 — by Marc Alan Fishman
Marvel vs. DC: E3 Edition!
In case you've been under a rock, or don't pay any attention, this week the Electronic Entertainment Expo has been showcasing some fancy new titles due out soon for the current generation (that being the Sony Playstation 3, and Microsoft Xbox 360... sorry Wii-Heads) of video game systems that should tickle comic lover's thumbs.
From DC's mighty utility belt comes Batman: Arkham Asylum
From the House of Idea's comes another sequel in the celebrated 'dungeon-crawler' epic: Marvel Ultimate Alliance 2: Electric Boogaloo. OK, it's not an electric boogaloo... but what UA:2 is, is a continuation of Vicarious Vision's long running franchise that's looking to make the true leap to the next generation from its Playstation 2 / Xbox roots. UA:2 takes place in the current-ish comic storyline (Civil War anyone?) and allows players to take the reigns on some of Marvel's most popular characters. Want to smash and bash as the Hulk? Go ahead. Want to pilot some mighty armor as Iron Man? Hit the X button pal. Not a fan of the classics? No problem. UA:2 brings Matt Gargan's Venom, Deadpool, and the mighty Juggernaut as potential playable characters. Players will get to make their own teams, and take them into battles across several Marvel stalwart environments, from Latveria to the Barack Obama-Spider-Man-fist-bumping Washington D.C.. While Activision is hush-hush on an official street date for now, look for the Ultimate Alliance 2 to hit your local gaming emporium in the fall.
For more information on E3, and the scads of games being played by people more important than us, feel free to head to the official site.
Fri May 22, 2009 — by Marc Alan Fishman
Friday Night Fights: Man Vs. Machine!
It's gonna be another knock-down drag out fight! Tonight, on Friday Night Fights, we have a full card for your blood lust... er... pleasure! Tonight it's the long debated nerd battle to end all battles. Tonight we open the arena to answer the age old question... with no holds barred, and the time stream wide open, we bring you the fracas between Man and Machine! Will the Artificial Intelligence beat Homo-Sapiens back to the stone age? Will the human rebellion crush the bots under there beer fueled boots of glory? Will you consider buying a tee shirt at the concession stand so we can pay for the mess you all made at last weeks battle?!
Round One: The Manly Battle for All Time!In our first bout, we pit two time traveling tusslers against one another. If you'll move your attention to the entrance ramp, our first combatant is riding to the ring! Weighing in a solid 185 pounds... standing at 6 ft and ½ inches tall (in current time, of course)... wearing the gloomy military fatigues, carrying an M-4 Carbine with a look of determination on his grizzled face... He sent his own father back in time to conceive himself (The Novikov self-consistency principle, duh)... He's known as the Rebellion Rabble-Rouser! The Clobberin' Commando! The Terminator Trasher himself... John Connor!
And his opponent, making his way to the ring in the glowing time sphere... Wearing the snazzy red and green Time Suit, and sporting a mighty thick time-beard... He's gone back in time to save his own father from the future, and in turn saved 52 parallel universes (ok, not 52 exactly, but who's counting?)! He's known throughout the land as the Linear Linebaker... the Fightin' Forgotten Hero... the Zero-Hour-Man-of-Power... Introducing the Time Master himself... Rip Hunter!
This battle will be a clean fight, with free reign to use any time altering technology available to each combatant. Come out, shake hands, and let the battle begin! Oh... it seems they both went back in time before I started this introduction... Well, I'll shut up now and let them continue pummeling each other.
Round Two... our main event: The Megabyte Dog-Fight!Lowering from the sky comes our first combatant. Being represented by it's army of Gubernatorial T-800's, Liquidous T-1000's, and Needlessly Sexxy T-X's...It's known the world round as the Self-Aware Super Computer bent on the destruction of you, our viewing audience! Please put your hands together, and quickly line up for obliteration for Skynet!
Coming in from the other corner of the sky comes Skynet's opponent. Created by a wealthy orphan, fueled with hate by a low-level psychic, and represented by an army of it's own viral-laden nanotech super soldiers. With the big-red-eye of doom, and a plethora of mohawks, please get out of the killing lines of Skynet, and in an orderly fashion get into it's line for re-vaccination for Brother Eye!
If any of you survive this massive battle of awesome alloys, we'd sincerely appreciate if you leap off a cliff vote below for the winners of each bout. Bonus points for those who avoid capture.
